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Showing results for tags 'wal-mart'.
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I very quietly confided to my best friend that I was having an affair. She turned to me and asked, 'Are you having it catered'? And that, my friend, is the definition of 'OLD'! Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, 'How old was your husband?' '98,' she replied: 'Two years older than me' 'So you're 96,' the undertaker commented. She responded, 'Hardly worth going home, is it?' Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman: 'And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?' the reporter asked. She simply replied, 'No peer pressure.' I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes I'm half blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation; hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license. I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour.. But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over. An elderly woman decided to prepare her will and told her preacher she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Wal-Mart. 'Wal-Mart?' the preacher exclaimed. 'Why Wal-Mart?' 'Then I'll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week' My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out. It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffee maker. These days about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, 'For fast relief.' THE SENILITY PRAYER: Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.
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I was killing time between appts today, and thought I would run into Wal-Mart to get a few things. When I pulled up in the lot I came across a silver Venture with Wyoming plates parked there. I waited about 25 minutes for the owner to come out but had to leave for the next appt. before he came out. So if any of you were at Wal-Mart in Aberdeen South Dakota today, it would've been nice to talk to you.......
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So, after landing my new job as a Wal-Mart greeter, a good find for many retirees. I lasted less than a day . . . About two hours into my first day on the job, a very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids,yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance. I said pleasantly, "Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?" The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, "Hell no, they ain't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or stupid?" So I replied, "I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am. I just couldn't believe someone slept with you twice. Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart." My supervisor said I probably wasn't cut out for this line of work.
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Warning: Scam Against Older Men Women often receive warnings about protecting themselves at the mall and in dark parking lots, etc. This is the first warning I have seen for men. I wanted to pass it on in case you haven't heard about it. This is a 'heads up' for those men who may be regular customers at Lowe's, Home Depot, Costco, or even Wal-Mart. This one caught me totally by surprise. Over the last month I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your older friends. Here's how the scam works: Two nice-looking, college-aged girls will come over to your car or truck as you are packing your purchases into your vehicle. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. (It's impossible not to look). When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' but instead ask for a ride to McDonald's. You agree and they climb into the vehicle. On the way, one starts undressing and then starts crawling all over you, while the other one steals your wallet. I had my wallet stolen Sept. 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th, 17th, 20th, 24th, & 29th. Also Oct. 1st & 4th, twice on the 8th, 16th, 23rd, 26th & 27th, and very likely again this upcoming weekend. So tell your friends to be careful. What a horrible way to take advantage of us older men. Warn your friends to be vigilant. Wal-Mart has wallets on sale for $2.99 each. I found even cheaper ones for $.99 at the dollar store and bought them out in three of their stores. Also, you never get to eat at McDonald's. I've already lost 11 pounds just running back and forth from Lowe's, to Home Depot, to Costco, Etc. So please, send this on to all the older men that you know and warn them to be on the lookout for this scam. (The best times are just before lunch and around 4:30 in the afternoon.)
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Wal-Mart - $13.69 Canadian Tire - $15.99 Here in Ontario, it's a lot cheaper to buy Mobil 1 Synthetic MX-4T at Wally World....quite a significant difference in fact. I like the Mobil 1 oil, and this is the cheapest that I've been able to get it here. Not sure about pricing in the USA, but that's what we're paying here. gunk:think:
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My clutch works great until after I ride the bike for about twenty minutes, then it slips so bad I can hardley get the bike moving. I replaced the clutch and springs about two years ago. Could it be too much fluid in the reservoir or the oil level too high??? I think that I used wal-mart 10W40 when I changed the oil over the winter and I have never had problems with this oil before. Any help much appreciated! Tim -
I went back to Wal-Mart to clean out their stock of this magnificent ABS epoxy and BOOM! They were out and didn't even have the display any longer. A severe panic set in so I went on a mission and finally found it at O'Reilly Auto, AutoZone and K-Mart. Wheew...a close call! You might still have it at Wal-Mart where you live, but I'm pretty certain these others will carry it for quite a while.
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I don't know that this data is (or isn't) correct, but it wouldn't surprise me. I know for a fact that the HEB grocery chain in Texas went bankrupt in large part due to the proliferation of WalMart SuperCentres. 1. At Wal-Mart, Americans spend $36,000,000 every hour of every day. 2. This works out to $20,928 profit every minute! 3. Wal-Mart will sell more from January 1 to St. Patrick's Day (March 17th) than Target sells all year. 4. Wal-Mart is bigger than Home Depot + Kroger + Target + Sears + Costco + K-Mart combined. 5. Wal-Mart employs 1.6 million people and is the largest private employer. And most can't speak English 6. Wal-Mart is the largest company in the history of the World. 7. Wal-Mart now sells more food than Kroger & Safeway combined, and keep in mind they did this in only 15 years. 8. During this same period, 31 Supermarket chains sought bankruptcy (including Winn-Dixie). 9. Wal-Mart now sells more food than any other store in the world. 10. Wal-Mart has approx 3,900 stores in the USA of which 1,906 are Super Centres; this is 1,000 more than it had 5 years ago. 11. This year, 7.2 billion different purchasing experiences will occur at a Wal-Mart store. (Earth's population is approximately 6.5 billion.) 12. 90% of all Americans live within 15 miles of a Wal-Mart 13. Let Wal-Mart bail out Wall Street Cheers,
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Don't kill me, I know the question has been out about songs...they would be helpful, but I need some other guidance. I just bought an MP3 with 4 gig memory, I loaded all the songs I want from my CD's I own but ain't even touched 1 gig. There are alot more songs I want but don't want to buy full CD's at 14 bucks each just to get ONE song. Is there a place to get them that is trust worthy? I thought about getting a card from Wal-Mart, but all they had were Itunes and Napster. And got different reports from my teenage sons on those. Any suggestions?? And if this is a repost from someone else's question, I am sorry. Thank yall :bighug:group hug.
