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Found 12 results
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Successfully kickoff to international. 65 people showed up for pre mixer with more to come. Now sitting around campfire having Hot Sex and enjoying good company..
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This is about a very rare endangered parrot in New Zeland, it seems to be more attracted to humans than the opposite sex of it own kind..........:rotfl: [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9T1vfsHYiKY]Shagged by a rare parrot - Last Chance To See - BBC Two - YouTube[/ame]
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"Drafting Guys Over 60" This is funny& obviously written by a former soldier... New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60! I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing bass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year old's off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 55. For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy. Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill somebody that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for awhile.. An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-gun. If captured, we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser. Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, Away from the screaming and yelling. They could lighten up on the obstacle course however... I've been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, Nor did I ever do any pushups After completing basic training. Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too... I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet. An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head. These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way. Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million pissed off old buggers with attitudes and automatic weapons, Who know that their best years Are already behind them. HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50...In menopause!!! You think MEN have attitudes?? Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night! Send this to all of your senior friends...it's in big type so they can read it.
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An Elderly Newfie woman of advanced age visited her physician to ask his advice in reviving her husband's libido.. 'What about trying Viagra?' asked the doctor. 'Not a chance', she said. 'He won't even take an aspirin.' 'Not a problem,' replied the doctor. 'Give him an 'Irish Viagra'. It's when you drop the Viagra tablet into his coffee. He won't even taste it. Give it a try and call me in a week to let me know how things went.' It wasn't a week later when she called the doctor, who directly inquired as to her progress. The poor dear exclaimed, 'Oh, faith, bejaysus and begorrah! T'was horrid! Just terrible, doctor!' 'Really? What happened?' asked the doctor. 'Well, I did as you advised and slipped it in his coffee and the effect was almost immediate. He jumped straight up, with a twinkle in his eye and with his pants a-bulging fiercely! With one swoop of his arm, he sent me cups and tablecloth flying, ripped me clothes to tatters and took me then and there passionately on the tabletop! It was a nightmare, I tell you, an absolute nightmare!' 'Why so terrible?' asked the doctor, 'Do you mean the sex your husband provided wasn't good?' Lord tunderin, 'twas the best sex I've had in 25 years! But sure as I'm sittin here, I'll never be able to show me face in Tim Hortons again!'
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Dogman and his wonderful wife came visiting recentlhy, and brought some Hot Sex with them. They rode over six hours through rain threatening weather to bring it. We had a great visit and all enjoyed the Hot Sex and after that, we told stories around a campfire. Thanks Dave and Bernie!
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Man Who Had Sex With Horse Released From Prison Man Ordered To Stay Away From Stable POSTED: Monday, March 21, 2011 UPDATED: 4:21 pm EDT March 21, 2011 http://www.news4jax.com/images/structures/misc/email_story_icon.gifEmail http://www.news4jax.com/images/structures/misc/print_story_icon.gifPrint http://www.news4jax.com/images/structures/misc/twitter_story_icon.gif http://www.news4jax.com/images/structures/misc/facebook_story_icon.gif http://www.news4jax.com/images/structures/misc/buzz_story_icon.gif http://www.news4jax.com/images/structures/misc/google_story_icon.gif http://www.news4jax.com/images/structures/misc/digg_story_icon.gif http://www.news4jax.com/images/structures/misc/reddit_story_icon.gif http://www.news4jax.com/images/structures/misc/delicious_story_icon.gif MYRTLE BEACH, S.C. -- A South Carolina man who twice pleaded guilty to having sex with a horse has been released from prison after 16 months and ordered to stay away from the stable where the animal lives. Probation officials said Monday that Rodell Vereen, 51, was let out of prison March 1. Vereen must complete two years of probation or he will have to finish the five-year sentence he received in November 2009 after pleading guilty to buggery and trespassing. The Sun-News of Myrtle Beach first reported Vereen's release. Vereen was arrested after the owner of the horse staked out her stable and caught Vereen sneaking inside. She held him at gunpoint until police arrived. The owner said she spent several nights in the barn after catching Vereen having sex with the animal on surveillance tapes. She feared he had returned because her horse was acting strange and getting infections again. She also noticed dirt and hay piled up near the horse's stall in Longs, about 20 miles northeast of Myrtle Beach. Vereen was caught having sex with the same horse in late 2007 and was on probation from that incident when he was arrested a second time, authorities said. The owner of the horse didn't immediately return a message from The Associated Press on Monday, but her husband said she knew Vereen was out of prison and she was scared he would come back to their stables. A phone number for Vereen couldn't be found. Before he pleaded guilty, he told Myrtle Beach television station WMBF-TV he was sorry if he hurt the horse or anyone else. He said he wasn't taking his medicine for schizophrenia when he went to the stables and promised to keep taking his medicine when he got out of prison. Vereen also must continue to register as a sex offender. ___ Information from: The Sun News, http://www.thesunnews.com/
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You boys down south see life differently Like you'll blip out **** but not sex on the forum and See **** its sht
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Okay, the kid is only 20 weeks along in these shots. I just thought it's amazing what they're doing with Ultrasound these days. No idea if it's a boy or a girl. The Technician asked my daughter if they wanted to know the sex of the child... she said "no", I said "we do", Technician said "Tough, if mama doesn't want to know, nobody gets to know".
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PENSION SEX Two men were talking. 'So, how's your sex life?' 'Oh, nothing special. I'm having Pension sex.' 'Pensionsex?' 'Yeah, you know; I get a little each month, but not enough to live on!' LOUD SEX A wife went in to see a therapist and said, 'I've got a big problem, doctor. Every time we're in bed and my husband climaxes, He lets out this ear splitting yell.' 'My dear,' the shrink said, 'that's completely natural. I don't see what the problem is.' 'The problem is,' she complained, 'it wakes me up!' QUIET SEX Tired of a listless sex life, the man came right out and asked his wife during a recent lovemaking session, 'How come you never tell me when you have an orgasm?' She glanced at him and replied, 'You're never home!' CONFOUNDED SEX A man was in a terrible accident, and his 'manhood' was mangled and torn from his body. His doctor assured him that modern medicine could give him back his manhood, but that his insurance wouldn't cover the surgery since it was considered cosmetic. The doctor said the cost would be $3,500 for 'small, $6,500 for 'medium, and $14,000 for 'large.' The man was sure he would want a medium or large, but the doctor urged him to talk it over with his wife before he made any decision. The man called his wife on the phone and explained their options. The doctor came back into the room, and found the man looking dejected. 'Well, what have the two of you decided?' asked the doctor. 'She'd rather remodel the kitchen.' WEDDING ANNIVERSARY SEX A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary. The husband yelled, 'When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: 'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever'.' 'Yeah,' she replies, 'when you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: 'Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.' ' WOMEN'S HUMOROUS SEX My husband came home with a tube of K Y jelly and said, 'This will make you happy tonight.' He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs. He couldn't get back in. ELDERLY SEX One night, an 87 year-old woman came home from Bingo and found her 92 year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor, assisted living apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court on the charge of murder, the judge asked her if she had anything to say in her defense. She began coolly, 'Yes, your honour. I figured that at 92, if he could have sex... He could also fly.'
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I love the Kumho that I installed. Here are the advantages. 1. Handles better 2. Rides smoother 3. Cost less 4. Replace less often 5. Makes the women fall all over you 6. Increases sex appeal by 78% 7. Better traction 8. Did I mention the women? Seriously, has anyone else noticed an improvement in turning radius or is it just my imagination?
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I'm sure most everyone read the hysterical story of the encounter a bike rider had with the Killer Squirrel, well here is chapter 2, short chapter but very funny.......... Tarzan & the Killer Squirrel When Jane initially met Tarzan in the jungle, she was attracted to him, and during her questions about his life , she asked him how he had sex "Tarzan not know sex" he replied. Jane explained to him what sex was. Tarzan said "Oh,....Tarzan use knot hole in trunk of tree." Horrified Jane said, " Tarzan you have it all wrong, but I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothing and laid down on the ground. "Here" she said, pointing to her privates, "you must put it in here." Tarzan removed his loin cloth, showing Jane his considerable manhood, stepped closer to her and kicked her in the crotch! Jane rolled around in agony for what seemed like an eternity. Eventually she managed to gasp for air and screamed "What did you do that for?" Tarzan replied, "Check for squirrel."
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Taking a piss in public will get you a sex offender rating, if you get caught in Texas. Is this for real.
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