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“Fiscal Cliff” put in a clear perspective which explains why so many of our American colleagues are dead against tax increases of any kind. Lesson # 1 * U.S. Tax revenue: $2,170,000,000,000 * Fed budget: $3,820,000,000,000 * New debt: $ 1,650,000,000,000 * National debt: $14,271,000,000,000 * Recent budget cuts: $ 38,500,000,000 Let's now remove 8 zeros and pretend it's a household budget: * Annual family income: $21,700 * Money the family spent: $38,200 * New debt on the credit card: $16,500 * Outstanding balance on the credit card: $142,710 * Total budget cuts so far: $38.50 Have you got it???? OK now, Lesson # 2: Here's another way to look at the Debt Ceiling: Let's say, You come home from work and find there has been a sewer backup in your neighborhood.... and your home has sewage all the way up to your ceilings. What do you think you should do ...... Raise the ceilings, or remove the crap? Tough decision, Eh?????
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Lesson 1 1. Go to the grocery store. 2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office. 3. Go home. 4. Pick up the paper. 5. Read it for the last time. Lesson 2 Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their... 1. Methods of discipline. 2. Lack of patience. 3. Appallingly low tolerance levels. 4. Allowing their children to run wild. 5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior. Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers. Lesson 3 A really good way to discover how the nights might feel... 1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner) 2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep. 3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM. 4. Set the alarm for 3AM. 5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial. 6. Go to bed at 2:45AM. 7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off. 8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM. 9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive) Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together. Lesson 4 Can you stand the mess children make? T o find out... 1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains. 2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer. 3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed. 4. Then rub them on the clean walls. 5. Take your favorite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it. 6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look? Lesson 5 Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems. 1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh. 2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out. Time allowed for this - all morning. Lesson 6 Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don't think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don't look like that. 1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there. 2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player. 3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Sprinkle cheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot. 4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car. Lesson 7 Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children. Lesson 8 1. Hollow out a melon. 2. Make a small hole in the side. 3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side. 4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane. 5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone. 6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air. You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby. Lesson 9 Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years. (I know, you're thinking What's 'Noggin'?) Exactly the point. Lesson 10 Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying 'mommy' repeatedly. (Important: no more than a four second delay between each 'mommy'; occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required). Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler. Lesson 11 Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the 'mommy' tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room. This is all very tongue in cheek; anyone who is parent will say 'it's all worth it!' Share it with your friends, both those who do and don't have kids. I guarantee they'll get a chuckle out of it. Remember, a sense of humor is one of the most important things you'll need when you become a parent!
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Took an MSF ERC (Experienced Rider's Course) yesterday and PASSED! It was a HOT mourning and instructors were kind enough to take 5-10 minutes breaks between each lesson. This course was held on an Military base , so I had to make sure I unloaded all my munitions ......bummer. Mostly HD's , 1- Honda, 1- Boulevard, and only myself on a RSV being the largest bike out there. For you riders whom have a harder time keeping the RSV upright in a parking lot speeds, you need to take this course! Needless to say it was not also FUN , but learned a few things and fine-tuned slow turning maneuvers. Instructors was surprised to see a large RSV jump over a 2 x4 (approaching road obstacle lesson) as they claimed I hopped over that board and at least 4" off the ground. I started out a bit nervous to say the least, but quickly looked at it as more their to have fun and relax and became one with the bike though I soaked in all info. Seriously, can you imagine that ? . All them painted lines on the course really played a mind trip on me at first. Each course lesson was conducted by at least a minimum of 4 passes after an instructor ran through the drill and another explained from his booklet with pictures of the course. We did figure 8's in widths of a tight 2 lane road down to a single width of one lane as well as Tight S turns, Feathering the clutch to high idle break control. Found out a lot of us focus on turns directly in front of ourselves and not turning the head and looking forward in our turns. One course was teaching us the brake abruptly in straight line, in a swerve or in a curve. I was surprised to hear all them HD's with ABS lock up their rear tires. Next time I take the course, it will be pulling the BEERCART and/or 2 up. If you haven't already taken a MSF , please do .You will learn more about yourself, your bike, and take advantage as a qualified instructor can observe and help fine tune your abilities. BEER30
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This last Friday 7-2 we were on are way home from a wonderful trip to the Black Hill. Pulled into a Flying J truck stop in Sioux Falls SD for gas. Go to turn in and down we go slid about 15 feet on its side, bike and trailer do a 180 and I laid in the middle of intersection wife step off the bike as it went down and didn't get hurt. My left knee hurt pretty bad . Come to find out a truck driver that had filled up forgot to put there cap back on and as he turned the corner to leave spilled out fuel on to the pavement and it splashed into the turning lane. No one seen who spilled the fuel. I didn't see it and when I braked and turned it was just like ice and down we went. After about an hour of talking to the manager, police and EMTs we get on bike and finish our last 250 miles. Go to hospital that night to have knee checked out find out I have a deep tear in my calf muscle and little road rash. The lesson is WATCH THE INTERSECTION AT TRUCK STOPS . Everyone be careful and have a safe summer I know I am going to pay more attention to the my turns in to fuel stops from now on.
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Guys I put my stock mufflers back on the RSV.No this isnt about who does or does not like loud pipes,I just got tired of the noise on LONG trips. The Lesson Learned.....CHECK YOU PART NUMBERS ON ANY PART YAMAHA SELLS YOU. I worked 5 hours trying to make my Exhaust gaskets fit on the Bike. I look at the part number....The last 5 numbers that is..Humm it says 14714,Why isnt it working,do I need to beat the gasket flatter to get it to fit proper? It fit in the muffler end..Whats the problem. I call Ponch , He says its real easy. I call Roadhand,"No problem Tom Just put it on and slide the muffler on"..OK another 45 minutes I am now about to stroke out so I go look at the part # on the Internet parts catalog The full Part # is 3XW-14714-00-00..well I said Thats what I have...Puzzled so I look at the package the guy gave me...Part # 4NNK-14714-00-00..(wrong Number) What a dumb a$$..I put the mufflers on in 20 minutes after getting the correct part. The part #4NNK-14714-00-00 is the gasket for the header pipe. Lesson is what all our wives have told Us,READ THE DIRECTIONS, in this case READ THE PART number. Im writing this to give a heads up as it was frustrating to say the least. Be safe Tom
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Well today we went to the Carolina Motorcycle Rally in Jacksonville, NC and well let me backtrack a bit. Everyone needs to know when to keep their mouths shut, me well I guess I haven't learned that lesson yet. Well maybe I did today. Earlier this week KR asked me if she could buy some more pin stripe decals for her Volusia. I said that I thought it was GAUDY enough already............Yeah I know, not too bright, but I wasn't feeling too good at the time and it just jumped right on out there. Back to the story. Today at the Motorcycle Rally we just happened to park right smack dab in front of a Custom Pin Striping booth. Man what luck. Long story short, Krome Rose now has a REAL Pin Striping job done on her bike. As much as I like to complain, it looks pretty darn good for the price. She asked me on the way home "How's your money look on my bike" again Lesson Learned!! I'm posting the pics, everything on the bike except the Krome Rose and Roses on the rear fender was done today for, are you ready for this? Drum Roll Please. $115.00 I guess I got away cheap for that slip of the mouth. I have a recording of her saying she was never getting rid of the bike and was FINISHED putting accessories on it. If I could only be for certain. The guy did the rose on the take on his own. She/We didn't ask for it, he just did it. The Pic of Krome Rose is when she saw the Rose on the tank the first time. It was worth the money to see her so happy.
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85 Years Young, And She Is Still Loves Riding. Last summer I was honoured and privileged to take her for one more ride. It absolutely made my day when she asked if she could go for a ride. She said her first time riding was during the war when she was a nurse. Hopefully she will still ride with me again this summer. Sometime you need to take a lesson from someone with wisdom and experience. She taught me you’re never too old to enjoy life. http://www.venturerider.org/forum/album.php?u=6421
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This would have been quite an honor in which to participate. I fear we all have too soon forgotten a valuable lesson... http://www.usatoday.com/news/sept11/2008-08-23-memorial_N.htm?csp=15
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To keep it in a straight line. But 100 ft of inch thick mud was more than I could get thru. Luckily just some road rash and a busted up bike. Weird thing was that 2 horses with their halters still on were just wondering down the median so I moved to the right lane and slowed to around 20 to keep an eye on them. Just as I got past them I saw I was going into the mud so I couldn't hit the brakes or try to swerve. So I guess the lesson here is WATCH for the mud and forget about the horses in the middle of the road... These big bikes will jump right up on them curbs at that speed. Its keepin it on the sidewalk after you get there is the trick.
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I hit the horn and the starter button at the same time and pow, no more power. I guess that was too much for the 30 amp main fuse. Lesson learned.
