Ive been there left a marriage of 13 yrs with just the clothes on my back, nothing more. I gave her the house & car for the kids sake, I did everything I could to make it easy on my kids. My daughter who was 13 chose to live with me. My son who was 8 had to live with his Mom. He wanted to live with me but he was so young I was afraid he would change his mind. long story short she had a wreck coming from her BF's house and my son was killed. No matter how BAD one has it I promise it could be & can be worse. At the time I was re-married after 3 yrs being divorced, don't know how I would have survived if not for my 2nd wife, she has been my rock.. She has stood by me even when I should have been kicked to the curb.
ADVICE is easy to give....but the best advice is to do what is best for the kids... staying and fighting isn't always best.. each case is different...
my wife and I have been married 16 yrs 7 months, we are happier now than 16 yrs 6 month and 3 weeks ago....it hasn't always been easy and there was a time I wanted out but I didn't want to lose my BEST FRIEND, who happens to be my wife...
Paul best of luck to you..you and your family will be in my prayers....