Leaderboard

I honestly opened this thread expecting it was about sockets or some other tool.

Geez, how much fun can you have? Right! Man, they should have given you a good dose of demerol. I had a couple of injections of demerol way back when the doc set some bones. I could still feel the pain, but I didn't care! That was some good shxt!

The PTSD of having 75 staples removed has finally passed, so I thought I would share how it went at the surgeon's office last Monday to have my staples removed. The doc came in, saw that everything was good, and left me to his Physicians Assistant. (I don't think he can stand the sight of blood!) She smiled at me the same way my wife smiles at me when I need to take out the trash, or work on her car! I knew I was in trouble. She leaned in, and said "Mr. Harrell, we usually only remove about 35 to 40 staples at one time due to the fact that the pain and bleeding becomes so great that you run the risk of passing out!" I told her flat out that if we start this, and I walk out of here with half of those staples in me, I will go to my grave with them still there because you will NEVER get me back in here! She took a step back and said, "Okee Dokee!" She prepared a tray with the items to remove the staples and I could feel sweat dripping from my forehead! The last thing she opened was a sterilized package with the "Staple Removal Tool" in it. I swear to God that tool looked like a pair of 3 foot long branch loppers! (Only from MY perspective) I gasped, and my wife, (a retired nurse) started to chuckle! When she crunched down on that first staple, I thought she was cutting 1/4" bolts in two! (Only from MY perspective) That first staple was about an inch from "Mr. Winkey", and I was beginning to feel like a gelding on an episode of Dr. POL. (The Vet Show) She plucked the first 10 staples out with deft precision, and looked up at my face to see how I was doing. By then the blood was flowing pretty freely, (I'm not bothered by the sight of blood) and other than a death grip on the gurney, I was still OK. When she got up around the belly button area, she was having to use a twisting motion to remove the staples! I NEVER made a sound! But I did feel the tubing of the gurney start to give due to my death grip! (Only from MY perspective) I was starting to breathe pretty heavy now, and I was only 20 staples in! After she passed the Belly Button area, the next 20 staples went like the first 10. Painful, but relatively quickly. After number 40 was removed she mopped up the blood, and announced "This is where I usually stop Mr. Harrell." And through clinched teeth and labored breath I blurted out, "I'm fine, lets keep going!" She looked at my wife, she shrugged, and she once again said, "Okee Dokee!" When she got back into it, I closed my eyes, and at that point the next 20 staples were a blur. I thought it would be a good idea to open my eyes as we passed staple number 60. This was a mistake! I began to develop tunnel vision, and I could hear the sounds of people talking, but I couldn't make out what they were saying! After what seemed like for ever, she took her gloved hand, dripping with MY blood, firmly lifted my chin, looked me in the eyes with a different smile, (I have NO idea what I was looking at before she did this) and said, "OK, we're all done!" I made a noise, but it wasn't a word, and I nodded. She looked at my wife and said, "Nobody's ever lasted that long before in this office!" She leaned in on me again, and placed a cookie in my hand and whispered, "eat this quick, so you don't pass out on the way to your car in front of your wife!" I deftly pushed the cookie into my mouth, but did not chew it. (My wife later told me I looked like a chipmunk) After a few minutes, it was clear that I was not going to be allowed to leave until I swallowed that cookie! Shortly after eating the cookie, I felt much better. My wife never said a word on the ride home. And that my friends, is what the removal of 75 staples sounds like! (Only from MY perspective) Earl

Is that not a tad like the suicide bomber instructor .....Who insists the students pay close attention and better get it the 1st time, because he is only going to demonstrate once.

sounds like @Flyinfoolgot a tad over zealous after being laid up so long and up and drastically overshot his usual targets and volumes. and a course I's done wents ta a leavin dat dern back door open a tad longer than usual cause I tawt he'd be too's a busy a convalescing to tink abouts dat dern little toy a is