Stupid Things you did

[Larry1963]

Not sure if there is a post like this somewhere here, if there is sorry you can delete this post. But since it is winter months for many of our friends up North, maybe some of you can share stupid but funny things you have done over the years with the bike.

 

My first one is, it was 28 degrees here in South GA, I just got my 01 Victory, I dressed warm, and was headed down the street. At the end of the street was a fire dept. and a stop light. I stopped at the light and my bike died, all the lights where on but the bike just died. Well I turned the key off and on, checked to make sure kickstand was up, all the things I could think of the bike just would not start, well the traffic light had gone from red to green back to red again. Well a couple of fire fighters come out to help push the bike and said I could park it in their parking lot. We pushed it around the corner and the whole time I am swearing under my breath about this bike. Well we get to the parking lot so I try one more time, NOTHING! Well by now a really young fireman showed up, and said "I do not know much about bikes but doesn't that switch need to be on?" With thicker gloves than I was use to I had accidently hit the kill switch and didn't know it. One of the older fire fighters said, you have a licenses for this thing, right? Another one chimes in, well there is job security......

 

I felt real small as I rode off on my shinny bike...

 

Larry

[Sailor]

Pulled up in front of the coffee shop. My mind was elsewhere. Came to a stop. Slowly fell over. Had forgotten to put my foot down. Of course everyone in the café had a good laugh.

[rickardracing]

I could write an encyclopedia on all the stupid stuff I have done in 51 years.

[Larry1963]

I could write an encyclopedia on all the stupid stuff I have done in 51 years.

 

It going to be a long cold winter, you can post more than one story. Go for it.

I was thinking just with our motorcycles, but if you want to get over the years I could write a book on stupid I have done for these past 52 years

[djh3]

I'll stick to motorcycle related stuff. Otherwise will probably run out of band width or whatever.

I had been riding off road dirt bikes for awhile off and on for a couple years then had a break. While at a friends house he had a yamaha dt 125 maybe and a Bultaco something. We go blasting off down a path, him on the yamaha and me on the Bultaco. Had to make a left hander kind of hard so I grabbed some rear brakes. Well I thought it was going to brakes. At that time the Bultacos were one of them bike the dang pedals were opposite of what I had been riding, so I got me the next lower gear very very quickly. Shortly there after I was picking my butt off the ground. Last time I think I rode anything with the reversed pedal deal. Dang Italians.......

[Beach Bum]

20 years old riding home 3 hours after a long weekend at my girlfriends cottage. Yes it was a long weekend and yes I was tired. So after about an hour of riding at about 70mph on a long and boring highway I fell asleep. On the bike. At 70mph. I woke up somehow just in time to push off the drivers window of the car I was careening into. Drifted back into my lane and straight over to the shoulder. Needless to say I got off at the first exit, shaking like a leaf, and downed a couple of coffees. I always wondered how the driver of that car felt. Probably the most dangerous situation I've ever put myself into on a bike.

[Zzyzx]

20 years old riding home 3 hours after a long weekend at my girlfriends cottage. Yes it was a long weekend and yes I was tired. So after about an hour of riding at about 70mph on a long and boring highway I fell asleep. On the bike. At 70mph. I woke up somehow just in time to push off the drivers window of the car I was careening into. Drifted back into my lane and straight over to the shoulder. Needless to say I got off at the first exit, shaking like a leaf, and downed a couple of coffees. I always wondered how the driver of that car felt. Probably the most dangerous situation I've ever put myself into on a bike.

 

WOW! Good you are still around to share that one with us

[Zzyzx]

Back in the early 70's I had a Honda 305 Scrambler I had bought from a buddy.

I had only had it about 3 weeks and liked to ride it to work.

Heading home after work one day I went over a RR track and just beyond the last track was a lot of sand on the road.

All of a sudden the car in front of me came to a very quick stop.

I hit the brakes and slid on the sand right into the rear of the car braking his taillight lens

The guy got out of his car and asked if I was OK.

I told him I was, he got back in his car and turned left into a liquor store lot.

Me and the bike were fine but I guess his thirst just couldn't wait.

 

Moral of the story, Don't ride to close behind a thirsty man.

[aharbi]

My friends and I were discussing this just the other day. Not bike specific, but my brothers and I can honestly state it is an honor to be here today. We time and time again pushed Darwin's theory to the limit. How we made it out of our teens alive god only knows. Oh my poor mother, rest her soul - she earned it!

[The Tooch]

Bought my 1st bike when I was 15 and I turned 16 that August and did the test and got my bike drivers license on my birthday.

 

1st week of September and the summer holidays are over. I'm back at High school and one of the coolest guys cause I ride a motorcycle to school everyday. The 3rd day back I sleep in and I'm running late, rushing around like a fool trying to makeup time and get out of the house. I Jump on my bike pull out of the garage and going screaming down the driveway......I didn't notice it had rained over night.....never rode on wet roads before......didn't really matter I'm stupid, still half asleep and not paying attention anyways.....got to the end of the driveway tried to turn right......bike went down sliding across the road till both wheels hit the curb, on the other side of the roadway...the bike pitched up and over landing on the sidewalk and threw me on the neighbours front lawn. The Public grade school was just down the street from our house. All the little kids were walking on their way to school.....looking at the not so cool High school kid face down with his helmet in the mud on his neighbours lawn.

 

Somehow the bike was fine and I wasn't hurt, except my pride! And so it begins...the 1st of many dumb things I have done on a bike.

[bj66]

Oh the list is long of stupid stuff like jumping approaches on my dirt bike without a helmet.

 

This one particular incident actually wasn't my bike but what we did to a friends bike. Being a small rural town of 100 or so people, several of us farm kids had enduro motorcycles that we rode all the time. So we'd ride in to baseball practice and games, after all why peddle a bike when you can ride a motorcycle. Everybody was always pulling pranks so you had to be on your toes at all times. For example we would go turn the radios all the way up and turn on the wipers of my friends parents vehicles etc. and sit back and watch. You get the idea, all harmless fun.

Sure enough, this turned to our motorcycles. You always had to check your idle screw, because somebody would turn that baby up so when you kick started it, it would be screaming. One of my friends always would park his bike (which he had outgrown) right in the way between the bleachers and the concession stand and people would have to walk around it. Sure enough we turned up his idle screw. A parent hollered at him to move his bike out of the way. He straddled the bike and was quite a bit taller than the seat. He gave it one kick and it started, reving wide open. Only problem was it was in gear. It shot out from underneath him and hit the backstop about 10 feet in front of him. The bike climbed the backstop until it flipped over backwards. It wasn't done yet either, it started spinning cookies laying on its side, spraying dirt and gravel all over everybody. It must of spun half a dozen cookies before the engine quit. Lucky nobody got hurt, but I still laugh just thinking about it. That was almost 40 years ago, and I can still see the look on my friends face.

Edited December 9, 2015 by bj66
Duplicate

[bj66]

Oh the list is long of stupid stuff like jumping approaches on my dirt bike without a helmet.

 

This one particular incident actually wasn't my bike but what we did to a friends bike. Being a small rural town of 100 or so people, several of us farm kids had enduro motorcycles that we rode all the time. So we'd ride in to baseball practice and games, after all why peddle a bike when you can ride a motorcycle. Everybody was always pulling pranks so you had to be on your toes at all times. For example we would go turn the radios all the way up and turn on the wipers of my friends parents vehicles etc. and sit back and watch. You get the idea, all harmless fun.

Sure enough, this turned to our motorcycles. You always had to check your idle screw, because somebody would turn that baby up so when you kick started it, it would be screaming. One of my friends always would park his bike (which he had outgrown) right in the way between the bleachers and the concession stand and people would have to walk around it. Sure enough we turned up his idle screw. A parent hollered at him to move his bike out of the way. He straddled the bike and was quite a bit taller than the seat. He gave it one kick and it started, reving wide open. Only problem was it was in gear. It shot out from underneath him and hit the backstop about 10 feet in front of him. The bike climbed the backstop until it flipped over backwards. It wasn't done yet either, it started spinning cookies laying on its side, spraying dirt and gravel all over everybody. It must of spun half a dozen cookies before the engine quit. Lucky nobody got hurt, but I still laugh just thinking about it. That was almost 40 years ago, and I can still see the look on my friends face.

Edited December 9, 2015 by bj66

[BigLenny]

Last year after a days riding, we grabbed a room at a Hampton Inn in Russellville, Arkansas. The hotel manager was kind enough to let me park the bike on the sidewalk right next to the front door. I thought that was super nice of her, but unbeknownst to me and my wife, letting us park right at the front door entrance, staged us for an embarrassing scene to happen the next morning. After eating the complimentary breakfast, I went out and started warming the bike up. We eventually got everything loaded, put our jackets and helmets on, hooked up our intercoms, and gave each other the thumbs up for take off. I eased the clutch out and the bike went about a foot before the ole disc brake lock did it's job. LOL. I had the front wheel turned to the right, so when the front wheel locked up, it dropped to the right faster than I could get my bearings. I almost saved it, but no deal. The bike fell onto it's crash bars and didn't roll over any father than that. However, my wife and I both tumbled off our seats and went rolling on the drive thru in front of the hotel front door. We then did the old person git up type thing. After the initial shock of the deal, I started laughing my head off. The hotel manager came running out the front door asking if we were alright. She looked puzzled that I was laughing. Several hotel patrons were going in and out at that time and served as perfect witnesses. Stupid me. Learned me a memorable lesson that day. I now have a "Remove Before Flight" tag i clip onto my right throttle cable to remind me my disc brake lock is on.

[Larry1963]

[Freebird]

These are fun stories but maybe this thread should be in the "embarrassing moments" forum? Not a big deal but I could move it if you think it should.

[Larry1963]

I did not know there was such a forum, go ahead and move it.

[slowrollwv]

I had just turned 18 and was staying with my oldest brother and wanted to go home for the weekend. I borrowed his Honda 350 and took off, it was the week before Christmas and about 40* at his house. I had to go 50 miles to home and as I got to the bottom of the first mountain I had to go up it was raining. No big deal I road in the rain before. When I got to the top it was getting colder and snow flurries. About 15 miles from home it was snowing pretty good and I had another mountain to go up. As I went up the mountain the snow started to lay on the edges of the road when I got to the top the road was covered in slush and I still had 10 miles to go. Keeping my feet down like outriggers I made it to the house but could not get off the bike. I had ice covering all my clothes. Had to break the ice in order to move.

[gez]

Taconic State Parkway, upstate NY. On the Honda 350 mid afternoon, wife on the back, coming home from a party after working a midnight tour. Things are going well until I get a big squeeze around my chest. "Where are you going," she said. I had fallen asleep and jumped the small curb and was driving on the grass. Thank God she was there to wake me up. That was the first wife, she never got on the bike again.

[BlueSky]

I was riding my first bike a Honda CB350. I pulled up to a stop sign. Several cars were coming from the left and I wanted to turn left. The first car made a right turn into the street where I was sitting so i gave it the gas and pulled out making my left turn. Problem was the second car decided to pass the turning car and could have collided with me. I gunned the bike and being an inexperienced rider, I hadn't learned to make a turn that fast and I saw I was headed into the curb. I jumped off the bike (Hey, this was 1971 and I was coordinated back then!) I landed on my feet and the bike ran up against the curb and slithered down the curb and never fell over. So, being totally embarassed, I got back on the bike and gunned it so hard that I did a wheelie. No harm, no foul. It did bend up my brake pedal just a tad.

[videoarizona]

Let's see: 1967.. Honda 160 twin...Going from college in Boston to New Hampshire in winter. Stopped at restaurant for coffee... My hands were frozen.. Had to slide throttle hand off of grip... Not smart in those days!

1969.. In Phoenix.. Riding the river beds on BSA 441 Victor. Jumping the little hills zipping down the riverbed when I zipped up one that has a sharp downhill on other side. Uh oh... Found out the hard way that 441's are front heavy! Obviously not much smarter.

1972 on DS6C 250 Yamaha ... Loaded for road trip across country. Trying to show off in front of sisters house... Did a nice wheelie slammed second and... Well.. Over she went on her back. Nothing hurt but pride and some bike scrapes. Obviously...still not much smarter.... And I'll stop here before I get to embarrassed!

[Eck]

There isn't enough bandwidth here to accommodate all the stupid things I have ever done.

[SilvrT]

Doing first oil change on my "new to me" '06 RSMV. Got the oil draining, decided to have a beer and do some polishing, this after already having a few beers. Finished the beer and the polishing and went to get the oil filter off. It wouldn't budge. Tried every trick I knew to no avail. Decided to drill a big hole through it and use a round bar thru the hole for leverage. That worked! Put a new filter on, had another beer, added the oil, did some more polishing and then decided to get rid of the old oil from the pan.

 

Got all the oil disposed of but to my HORROR there were metal filings in the bottom! OMG I thought, There's something MAJOR wrong with this engine! I was really in a frightful panic for a few minutes ... and then I realized... it was the filings from drilling the hole in the filter! How embarrassing ... yet nobody else was there to witness it!

 

Was it the beer that clouded my memory? LOL

[cowpuc]

There isn't enough bandwidth here to accommodate all the stupid things I have ever done.

 

WHat da heckster Eckster, we GOTTA be related

 

1973, took my perfectly good XS650 Yam - chopped her down - its was the age of the CHOPPERSS!! Nice Cali Springer, Amen Frame, 21 inch spooley, peanut tank,,, life was GREAT!! Had an awesome job working at place called Gardner Denver in Grand Haven - worked 3rd shift (always been a nite owl) making great money.. Lost track of time titteling with my new MX Bike (bought a brand new Honda CR250M Elsinore - AWESOME SCOOT - did lots of stupid things with it too ) and found myself late for work ! Hopped on the Chop and headed in.

Ride was uneventful as I left our small town, just passed the highschool and I was ringing her out. Car went by in other direction and I caught the glare of the MI State Police sticker on side of car. No idea how fast I was going (only dorkwads had a speedo on a chop) but 4th was floating the valves as I shifted into 5th when he went by. Quick head check showed brake lights from the Boys in Blue:doh:. Knew every dirt bike/snowmobile trail in the area (of course), figured it was either a late mark on my time card at work or a BIG speeding fine - chose the late mark. Quick right on a paved road - flashers about a mile back. Revved her out to end of pavement and onto two track - red lights gaining - quick left on two track that led to a snowmobile bridge over a real muddy creek that had a single track on the other side of it - had ridden this many many many times on both sleds and dirt bikes and KNEW once I got across the wooden bridge it was BYE BYE TIME!!

Ripped up the 1/2 mile of two track on the chop - could see no lights in the woods around me = FANTASTIC:biker:!! Hit the bridge doing about 30 on my Chop, got to the back side of the bridge and DISCOVERED THAT SOME KIDS HAS USED THE BACKSIDE OF THE BRIDGE TO BUILD A TREE FORT OUT OF:confused24:!! I buried 4 feet of gorgeous California Springer front end into 4ft of the blackest, narliest, stickest, smelliest muck known to man!! Almost went over the bars and I would have if the 6 bends I was running would not have slipped in the dog bones allowing the pullbacks to roll forward so the grips were now almost even with the front axle - my body was laid across the tank and my face was hanging over the Bates headlight!! I jumped off and started tugging - could NOT move it!!!

All of a sudden I notice headlights coming thru the forest real slow.. It was dead quiet out and I can still hear the soft rumble of the big block Mopar engine that the State Police used back then.. Was nothing I could do, I was sitting backwards on the "Queen" section of the King/Queen seat with my chin resting on the padding that followed the seat up the sissy bar when the cruiser pulled up to the bridge - figured it was for sure..

Two of the nicest Police Officers a kid could ever run into climbed out of the cruiser. The Officer who was driving walked up the ramp of the bridge right to the edge where my bike sat, he asked what was going on.. I told him I was out trail riding and didnt see the tree fort the kids had built in the tree about 50 feet away until it was to late..

He looked at me, looked at my bike and then looked at his partner and they both BURSTED OUT IN TOTAL HILARIOUS LAUGHTER .. After they finished, he looked back at me and said "Oh yea,,, we see this all the time:rotfl:"

He then asked me if I knew how fast how was going back there in the 55 zone:detective:.. All the fight was gone,, time to own up,, I told him I didnt have a speedo but would guess 85.. He said try 102.. Then he said I need you to come back to the car. When we got to the car he told me he wouldnt let me in the rear seat where I belonged cause I was covered in mud:8:, then he and his partner got inside - he then asked me again what was going on, I leveled with him and told him the whole story. He and his partner talked for few minutes and started writing. He then turned to me with the paperwork and said "because of the circumstances I am gonna let you by with 15 over - we are also riders and what just happened is STUPID crazy"..

Their next move was absolutely amazing, those two officers helped me get my bike out of the mud , tow strap around the rear wheel hooked to the push bumper on the squad car and it went "Spuck" when the muck released the Spooley!! We lifted the back of the bike up on the remaining skid that made up the front of the bridge - rolled her back down the rest of it and I followed em back out of the trail and onto the pavement. It was a LONG nite standing at Warner Swasey Turret Lathe covered from head to toe in stinky creek muck,,,,,,, actually it was kinda nice cause the neither the boss nor the parts inspector came near me for the whole 6 1/2 hours I was there

[SilvrT]

@cowpuc man oh man you can tell a story ... but I wonder, how fast can you type? Are you a two index finger typist or do you use all of 'em? Most of your posts are quite lengthy and that's a lotta typin! So it made me wonder

[cowpuc]

Nah @SilvrT,, took typing back in college, had to do 35 wpm touch typing to pass. Problem now is my hands are shot with Dupentrens (right hand little finger is almost locked down to my palm) so I am wayyy slower but still able to get by ok.. If you think I can type,, you gotta meet me in real life and see how well I can

 

Almost can keep up with folks like @Marcarl or even @saddlebum

In all fairness, kindness and decency to myself though - I am AMAZED at how fast people can thumb text!! Now THAT is amazing and a type of type I simply cannot do!!