Flyinfool Posted July 18, 2013 #1 Posted July 18, 2013 I guess that tonight is the night were everyone gets to make bad jokes at my expense in chat, while I run back and forth........
dacheedah Posted July 18, 2013 #2 Posted July 18, 2013 soo you can chat while takin a , well ugh, wet chat medicated wipes are awesome, been there
painterman67 Posted July 18, 2013 #3 Posted July 18, 2013 sorry all I can think of is chitty chitty bang bang........well actually something else but since this is a og site you know the drill
dacheedah Posted July 19, 2013 #4 Posted July 19, 2013 sorry all I can think of is chitty chitty bang bang........well actually something else but since this is a og site you know the drill great it took 20 years to get that song out of my head and you put the 8 track back in:banana:
CaptainJoe Posted July 19, 2013 #5 Posted July 19, 2013 Just remember, it's probably not gas.... More likely a Shart!
Huggy Posted July 19, 2013 #6 Posted July 19, 2013 Hope you live in a two bathroom house. You may need to take up residence in there for a while.
RedRider Posted July 19, 2013 #8 Posted July 19, 2013 Jeff, Good luck tomorrow. While this is fun to joke around about (at least fun for us), you are doing something really serious. Hope it all turns out ok. RR
Big Lou Posted July 19, 2013 #9 Posted July 19, 2013 Yea, hope everything comes out allright.....oh and good luck with THE DR.
Flyinfool Posted July 19, 2013 Author #10 Posted July 19, 2013 Oh everything is coming out alright........ that's fer sure. yes the dr part is a whole nuther thing to worry about. Right now I am just hoping to survive drinking this liquid poo. I will still be in chat all night, I don't dare doze off.......
bongobobny Posted July 19, 2013 #12 Posted July 19, 2013 Have a nice dream today, and when you wake up, blow it out your a$$ you gasbag!! They won't let you leave until you do...
Sailor Posted July 19, 2013 #13 Posted July 19, 2013 Dare I say..."Shi*s that pass in the night"? I said Ships.....what did you think?
jakester Posted July 19, 2013 #14 Posted July 19, 2013 Sometimes it is like math, you gota work it out with a pencil. Sorry My first one I was about 30 and when I woke there was a smoking hot nursing school intern standing there taking bp reading. I just could not hold it in, I started farting and just could not stop. She just smiled and said at least they do not smell. Hope everything comes out alright, no pun intended.
Flyinfool Posted July 19, 2013 Author #15 Posted July 19, 2013 Well the scarey night has come and gone, and gone, and gone, and............ Then came the ride to the DR office. Well lets just say I don't really care for most peoples driving, especially my Erika's. There are reasons that there are dents in every side of her car. She failed to comprehend the concept of taking the quickest route to the Dr office, or at least until she did not make the turn for the shortcut that would take 2 miles off of the trip. You see the fun of the scarey night had not yet ended, I was still running every 10 minutes. She took the 20 minute route instead of the 15 minute route. Then she asked why I had a bag of clothes, and I sad "the change of clothes and roll of TP is in case you take the long way there".......... Then she looked at her leather seats and the devilish smile quickly left her face as the meaning of my words sunk in. So she drove faster, only ran 3 red lights.......... About scared the **** out of me. Which would not take much in my current condition. But we did make it there safe and dry, but my toes were curled and I ran from the car to the nearest rest room. SAFE! But not by much........ Then came the the pre-op preparations and signing of releases, for the procedure. Once you are all wired up and IVed up there are no more trips to the rest room. That was the longest hour of my life, I really did not want to explode in bed with a room full of people This place was set up like an assembly line, with another patient lined up every 10 feet. Then the nurse injected something into my IV and the next thing I knew I was in recovery with Erika sitting next to me laughing at me as I was farting the "Star Spangled Banner", all 3 verses. Those high notes around the "rockets red glare" were tough but I hit them......, then came the "bombs bursting in air"........ The final verdict is that I am a perfect a$$, and now I have proof...... Nothing was found that was not supposed to be there, and everything that was supposed to be there was found. I was complimented on just how good of a job I did of cleaning myself out. So no one can say I am full of it either, cuz now I also have proof I am not. Then I explained to them about Lake Michigan is now flooding over its banks after everything I sent in that direction. For the next month I can eat anything I want cuz it has already been expelled. Thanks for everyone's, ugh, support? to help me through this Very Scarey Night.
dacheedah Posted July 19, 2013 #16 Posted July 19, 2013 Sooo I take it he didn't say Holy Sit, there's rum balls in there, and look a lil electrical gremlin too?
Flyinfool Posted July 19, 2013 Author #17 Posted July 19, 2013 Maybe my electrical gremlin found a new home with all of the electrical gizmos they have in a hospital, The first heart monitor that they hooked up only worked for a few seconds.....
Cougar Posted July 20, 2013 #19 Posted July 20, 2013 Oh goodie. now you get to do this all over in 3 to 5 years Congrats on your first time !
Flyinfool Posted July 20, 2013 Author #20 Posted July 20, 2013 Oh goodie. now you get to do this all over in 3 to 5 years Congrats on your first time ! NOOOOPE!!!!! I was so clean they said 10 years till the next one. I may not live that long. Especially that I now have a piece of paper from a real doc, and my honey was seated right there when I was told that is bad for me to hold back gas, pressure inside should be relieved. She was not happy with the doc..........
Huggy Posted July 20, 2013 #22 Posted July 20, 2013 NOOOOPE!!!!! I was so clean they said 10 years till the next one. I may not live that long. Especially that I now have a piece of paper from a real doc, and my honey was seated right there when I was told that is bad for me to hold back gas, pressure inside should be relieved. She was not happy with the doc.......... Awwww the winds of change!! How they blow in strange directions! And may the force be with you! And within you!!
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