saddlebum Posted February 1, 2011 #1 Posted February 1, 2011 Yesterday was my fathers funeral and it was very moving to see how maney people came to say good by. It was speacially nice to see Marcarl (Carl) and Chabicheka (Abdul) make an appearance. I also Wish to thank all of you who through these past three months have prayed for my Father or sent their best wishes for Him. It all meant alot to me. During the funeral The priest came to me and asked if I would have a few words to say in honour of my Dad. Getting up and speaking in front of a lot off people was not something I am comfortable with but for some reason two nights before while taking a shower words started to pop into my head and stranger still I felt a need to write them down. Before going to the funeral I printed off the words I wrote and stuck them in my pocket. Lucky for me I did. I know it is not much but I would like to share these words with all of you. IN MEMORY OF my FATHER Dad was not just a Father and a Husband, He was more. He was the closest of friends, a teacher, and a mentor and when needed a firm hand. To our Mother he was even more. To Him Mom was his whole world. Dad’s life was not always easy but together with Mom, they always managed to somehow move forward and do the best they could. Dad was always big about values, such as honesty and integrity. He would always say that any job worth doing, was worth doing right. For me that meant to always try to put quality into any job I tackled. When I performed any type of construction or wood work, I could feel Dad judging my work and I suspect I always will. Dad however was not just about work. He was about closeness of family, nature and all living things. Some of my fondest memory’s are of Sunday hikes, up the old 16 mile creek, with one or more of the Airedale Terriers, that Dad raised and bred. There were the toboggan trips in winter, on one of Dads homemade sleds. If there were no hills handy leave it to Dad to make a dog harness to pull us up and down the road by one of the dogs. There were also the trips to dog shows, were Dad could be found often helping others with advice and tips to bring out the best in there dog, despite the fact that he would be competing against them in the show ring. I have seen dad on more than one occasion walk out of the ring with 1st prize saying that he did not deserve it, that one of the other dog, in his opinion, was better, and even go so far as to question the judge, on his decision. He was definitely a rare man. There were years worth of trips to Huntsville, where we had a trailer in the forest, by a spring fed lake, where we spent much time and where Dad always seemed to be happiest and at peace with himself. Dad was a big believer in passing it forward long before it became an expression. His biggest example is when after WWII he joined the marines to go to Indonesia to help free that country of invaders just as the allied forces helped free Holland from occupation. If you ever asked Dad to define war, he would say “”War is when men fought men, who under different circumstances could just as easily become good friends””. When he told stories about the war it was usually about tough times, sad times, and humorous times. Rarely did he talk about the most dreadful of times. I am not sure what the future will be like without Dad in it, but I do know he will be dearly missed by family and friends but never lost or forgotten.
Guest Posted February 1, 2011 #2 Posted February 1, 2011 That was a very moving memorial, Ben. May you and your family find peace after these long last months. Cherish the memories and the happy times.
kenw Posted February 1, 2011 #3 Posted February 1, 2011 I know how you are feeling, I went through the same thing last year. My prayers and thoughts are with you. If you need to talk to someone, just give a call!
Dano Posted February 1, 2011 #4 Posted February 1, 2011 A very nice eulogy Ben, the words from the heart are always best. No better fitting tribute than that could be said.
Wizard765 Posted February 1, 2011 #8 Posted February 1, 2011 Thanks for sharing that Ben. It is fresh now but for the rest of your life there will be things you do or moments that bring up memories of your Dad. He will always be with you.
1joeranger Posted February 1, 2011 #9 Posted February 1, 2011 Wow,! What a great testimony to your Dad. I know he is very proud of the fine son he raised. May God shine on you! Thanks for sharing!
Squidley Posted February 1, 2011 #11 Posted February 1, 2011 Very nice Ben, and time will heal the sting. Here is a little something that I have found makes a lot of sense...all the best to you and your family my friend. Irish Tombstone Prayer Death is nothing at all, I have only slipped away into the next room. Whatever we were to eachother, that we are still Call me by my old familiar name, speak to me in the easy way which you always used to. Laugh as we always laughed together. Play, Smile, Think of me, Pray for me. Let my name be the household word that it always was, let it be spoken without effort. Life means all that it ever meant, it is the same as it ever was, there is absolutely unbroken continuity. Why should I be out of your mind because I am out of your sight? I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner. All is well, nothing is past, nothing is lost. One brief moment and all will be as it was before...Only better, infinitely happier and forever we will all be one together with Christ
chabicheka Posted February 1, 2011 #12 Posted February 1, 2011 Never met your dad, Ben.....from how you describe him, i wish i had. I can only judge him through knowing you, and i feel he's done a pretty good job of bringing you up. Am proud to have a friend like you and i am sure your dad must have been pretty proud of you too. You take care now, my friend and may god give you health and strength to take care of your mom and your family. Chabicheka.....( your mom must be wondering what planet i must be coming from with a name like that!)
pakidaho Posted February 1, 2011 #13 Posted February 1, 2011 Appreciate your sharing, your Dad will always be there with you. Many of my best conversations have been with my Mom during and after she passed, after forty years I still enjoy that moment of sitting and sharing the moment with her.
etcswjoe Posted February 1, 2011 #14 Posted February 1, 2011 Took me a few times before I could read the whole thing, very nice tribute. We lost Dad last year you never realize how much af an impact your Dad makes. Think of him often, laugh, cry and get mad with the memories but most of all cherish them. My prayers and thoughts are with you.
Jus Monkeyin Around Posted February 1, 2011 #15 Posted February 1, 2011 Ben, That is very touching, I am sorry for your loss. You will be in our thoughts and prayers.
saddlebum Posted February 1, 2011 Author #16 Posted February 1, 2011 Irish Tombstone Prayer Death is nothing at all, I have only slipped away into the next room. Whatever we were to eachother, that we are still Call me by my old familiar name, speak to me in the easy way which you always used to. Laugh as we always laughed together. Play, Smile, Think of me, Pray for me. Let my name be the household word that it always was, let it be spoken without effort. Life means all that it ever meant, it is the same as it ever was, there is absolutely unbroken continuity. Why should I be out of your mind because I am out of your sight? I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner. All is well, nothing is past, nothing is lost. One brief moment and all will be as it was before...Only better, infinitely happier and forever we will all be one together with Christ That was a very touching poem Brad. I am going to print it out and give it to my Mother, I think that she would really like it.
midnite Posted February 2, 2011 #17 Posted February 2, 2011 Praying for you and your family. Just went thru my mother passing. God Bless
zooer Posted February 2, 2011 #18 Posted February 2, 2011 Its a very tough thing when you lose a parent. Time kind of heals and life goes on. Keep the good memories fresh and remember they would only want to see you go on and be happy with your days on earth.
Squidley Posted February 2, 2011 #19 Posted February 2, 2011 That was a very touching poem Brad. I am going to print it out and give it to my Mother, I think that she would really like it. Ben, I'm glad you like it, it's a very fitting statement and it always makes me stop and listen for the ones that have gone to the other side....and yes, I do still hear them talk to me
paysaw Posted February 3, 2011 #20 Posted February 3, 2011 (edited) Sorry for your loss Ben. I have only met you once, but i could tell from that our meeting your father raised a great person.Keep his fond memories with you for the rest of your life. Tonight I lost my mother in law. Her life was taken by cancer.We stayed with her till her final breath. She has gone to better place, just like your father.Take care my friend. Ray Edited February 3, 2011 by paysaw
saddlebum Posted February 3, 2011 Author #21 Posted February 3, 2011 Sorry for your loss Ben. I have only met you once, but i could tell from that our meeting your father raised a great person.Keep his fond memories with you for the rest of your life. Tonight I lost my mother in law. Her life was taken by cancer.We stayed with her till her final breath. She has gone to better place, just like your father.Take care my friend. RayI am very sorry to hear that, I can honestly say I feel you and your wifes pain. My Condolences to you your wife and family.
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