Signs of the Times‏

[Ottawa]

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

 

 

 

 

 

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In a Podiatrist's office:

 

 

 

 

"Time wounds all heels."

 

 

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On a Septic Tank Truck:

 

 

Yesterday's Meals on Wheels

 

 

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At a Proctologist's door:

 

 

"To expedite your visit, please back in."

 

 

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On a Plumber's truck:

 

 

"We repair what your husband fixed."

 

 

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On another Plumber's truck:

 

 

"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

 

 

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On a Church's Bill board:

 

 

"7 days without God makes one weak."

 

 

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At a Tyre Shop in Milwaukee :

 

 

"Invite us to your next blowout."

 

 

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At a Towing company:

 

 

"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."

 

 

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On an Electrician's truck:

 

 

"Let us remove your shorts."

 

 

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In a Nonsmoking Area:

 

 

"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."

 

 

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On a Maternity Room door:

 

 

"Push. Push. Push."

 

 

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At an Optometrist's Office:

 

 

"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

 

 

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On a Taxidermist's window:

 

 

"We really know our stuff."

 

 

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On a Fence:

 

 

"Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!"

 

 

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At a Car Dealership:

 

 

"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."

 

 

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Outside a Muffler Shop:

 

 

"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

 

 

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In a Veterinarian's waiting room:

 

 

"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

 

 

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At the Electric Company

 

 

"We would be delighted if you send in your payment.

 

 

However, if you don't, you will be."

 

 

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In a Restaurant window:

 

 

"Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up."

 

 

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In the front yard of a Funeral Home:

 

 

"Drive carefully. We'll wait."

 

 

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At a Propane Filling Station:

 

 

"Thank heaven for little grills."

 

 

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And don't forget the sign at a

 

 

CHICAGO RADIATOR SHOP:

 

 

"Best place in town to take a leak." (And in Texarkana !)

 

 

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Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:

"Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises"