More Groaners!

[Nemo]

1. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said; "Keep off the Grass!"

 

2. The midget fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

 

3. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

 

4. A backward poet writes in verse.

 

5. In a democracy, it's your vote that counts. In feudalism, it's your count that votes.

 

6. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine.

 

7. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardes looks at

him and says, "I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger."

 

8. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were cold, so they lit a fire in the craft.

unsurprisingly it sank. Proving again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

 

9. Two Hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron."

The other says, "Are sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive."

 

10. There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at

least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

 

 

[RandyR]

I think my rear shock needs replacing....