Is anything LEGAL anymore?

[SilvrT]

There were 100 but I removed certain ones that I thought were pushing the PG limit.

 

1. In Oklahoma, you can be arrested for making ugly faces at a dog.

2. In Salt Lake County, Utah, it’s illegal to walk down the street carrying a violin in a paper bag.

3. In San Francisco, it’s illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner.

4. In Devon, Texas, it is against the law to make furniture while you are nude.

5. In Bozeman, Montana, a law prohibits all sexual activity from the front yard of a home after sundown.

6. In California it is illegal for a vehicle without a driver to exceed 60 miles per hour. (that would be one clever trick)

7. In Florida men seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown can be fined.

8. In South Carolina it is legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on Sundays.

9. In Tennessee, you are breaking the law if you drive while sleeping.

10. In New York, the penalty for jumping off a building is: Death.

11. In Danville, Pennsylvania, all fire hydrants must be checked one hour before all fires.

13. In Pennsylvania, it’s against the law to tie a dollar bill on a string on the ground and pull it away when someone tries to pick it up.

14. In New York City, it’s illegal for a restaurant to call a sandwich a “corned beef sandwich” if it’s made with white bread and mayonnaise.

15. In San Francisco, California it is unlawful to use used underwear to wipe off cars in a car wash.

16. In France, it is against the law to sell an “E.T” doll. They have a law forbidding the sale of dolls that do not have human faces.

17. In Louisiana, biting someone with your natural teeth is considered “simple assault,” but biting someone with your dentures is “aggravated assault.”

19. In Switzerland, it is illegal for a man to relieve himself while standing up after 10pm.

20. In Florida, it is illegal to fart in a public place after 6 P.M. on Thursdays.

21. In Massachusetts, it is illegal to go to bed without first having a bath. (However, another law prohibits bathing on Sunday)

22. In Jidda, Saudi Arabia, women were banned from using hotel swimming pools in 1979.

23. In Samoa, it’s a crime to forget your own wife’s birthday.

24. In Alabama, prison guards are forbidden from referring to their spouses as “the old ball-n-chain.”

25. In London, England it is illegal for a City cab to carry rabid dogs or corpses.

26. In England, it is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament.

27. In England, it is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the Queen upside down.

28. In Los Angeles, CA it’s illegal for a waiter to tell a customer “I’m really an actor.”

29. In Indiana, it’s against the law to dress ‘Barbie’ in ‘Ken’s’ clothes.

30. In Sedona, Ariz., it’s illegal to lie about your astrological sign.

31. In Texas, it’s illegal to threaten somebody with an UNLOADED gun.

32. In Australia, it’s illegal to name any animal you plan to eat.

33. In Cannes, France, it’s illegal to wear a Jerry Lewis mask.

34. In New Jersey, answering a traffic cop who asks “Do you know why I pulled you over?” by saying,“If you don’t know, I’m not going to tell you” is an automatic $300 fine.

35. In York, it is legal to kill a Scotsman within the ancient city boundary, but only if he is carrying a bow and arrow.

36. In London, it is illegal to flag down a taxi if you have the plague.

37. In Kentucky, it’s illegal to paint your lawn red.

38. In Portugal, it’s against the law to pee in the ocean.

39. In South Carolina unmarried women are not allowed to buy edible panties.

40. In Italy, anyone considered “obese” is forbidden from wearing polyester.

41. In Montana, it’s illegal to tear a phone book in half.

42. In California, anyone caught selling a “smoothie” that has lumps is breaking the law.

43. In Michigan, it is illegal to chain an alligator to a fire hydrant.

44. In Arkansas, it’s illegal for a woman getting married for the second time to wear a white wedding gown.

45. In Victoria. Australia after mid day on Sunday, it’s illegal to wear pink hot pants.

46. In Connecticut, night watchmen are forbidden from drinking decaf coffee while working.

47. In Kentucky, carrying ice cream cones in your pocket is illegal.

48. In International Falls, Minnesota, you can be fined if you let your dog chase a cat up a telegraph pole.

49. In Iowa, after 5 minutes of kissing you’re breaking the law.

50. In Illinois, giving a lighted cigar to a pet is illegal.

51. In the USA- 24 states say that if your husband is impotent its grounds for a divorce. (Go Viagra!)

52. In Miami, Florida, imitating animals is illegal.

53. In Oxford, Ohio, a woman undressing in front of a picture of a man is breaking the law.

54. In Baltimore, Maryland, taking a lion to the cinema is illegal.

55. In Washington, pretending to have wealthy parents is illegal.

56. In Texas, if you are going to commit a crime, you legally have to give 24 hours notice to the police.

57. In South Dakota, It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory.

58. In Maryland, Randy Newman’s song ‘Short people’ is still banned on the radio.

59. In St. Louis, Missouri, if a woman is in her night clothes, it is illegal for a fireman to rescue her.

60. In Victoria, Australia, you need a licensed electrician to change a light bulb.

61. In France, it’s illegal to name a pig Napoleon.

63. In San Salvador, drunk drivers can be sentenced to death by firing squad.

64. In Bahrain, male doctors only legally examine a woman’s genitals through a mirror.

65. In Providence, Rhode Island, selling tooth paste and a tooth brush to the same customer on a Sunday is illegal.

67. In Singapore chewing gum is illegal.

68. In Arizona, hunting camels is against the law.

69. In North Carolina, it is illegal to swear in front of dead people.

71. In Burma it is against the law to access the Internet. Anyone doing so faces prison.

72. In Iowa, it is illegal for horses to eat fire hydrant.

73. In Vermont, a woman must get written permission from her husband to wear false teeth.

75. In Los Angeles, it is illegal to bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.

76. In Oklahoma, it is against the law to have a sleeping donkey in your bathtub after 7 PM.

77. In Israel, you could be prosecuted for picking your nose on Sunday.

78. In Sweden it is illegal to use the services of a prostitute. Prostitution is legal though.

79. In Thailand, it is illegal to leave your house without your underwear on.

80. In California, it is illegal to keep a child from playing in puddles of water.

81. In Oklahoma, it is illegal to molest an automobile.

82. In Germany, it is illegal to stop on an autobahn (expressway). It is also illegal to run out of gas on an autobahn.

83. In Turkey, it is illegal for a man above 80 yrs to become a pilot.

84. In Chicago, it is illegal for anyone to eat in a place that is on fire.

85. In Pennsylvania, it is illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors.

86. In Eureka, Nevada, it is illegal for men with mustaches to kiss women.

87. In Ohio, it is against state law to get a fish drunk.

88. In Miami, Florida, it is illegal to skateboard in a police station.

89. In Florida, unmarried women who parachute on Sundays can be jailed.

90. In Texas, it is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel.

91. In Boulder, Colorado, it is illegal to kill a bird within the city limit.

92. In Alabama, it is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while driving a vehicle.

93. In Ames, Iowa, it is illegal for men to have three sips of beer while they are in bed with their wives.

94. In Chico, California, the law states that anybody who detonates a nuclear device within the city limits is liable to a fine of $500.

95. In Tremonton, Utah, it is illegal for a woman to have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance.

96. In British Columbia, it is illegal to kill a Sasquatch or Bigfoot if one is ever found.

98. In Minnesota, it is against the law to hang male and female underwear together on the same washing line.

99. In Texas, It is illegal to sell one’s own eye.

100. In Kentucky, it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon more than six-feet long.

[Aimhigh]

should be against the law for congress to pass laws while under the influence...had to be the case on some of these!

[Snaggletooth]

I found a law years ago that in Montana I believe it was, illegal to throw a moose from a flying airplane.

 

I don't really care but I just wanted to watch them try to put the moose INTO an airplane. I can understand throwing one out once it was in the air. Probably a rather unruly passenger.

[dray]

43. In Michigan, it is illegal to chain an alligator to a fire hydrant.

its also Illegal to walk your allagator on the side walk on a sunday.

its Illegal to drive your motor vehicle after sunset without some one walking 20 feet ahead of you swinging a lantern; so you dont scare a horse

[Aussie Annie]

Crazy how no-one thought to update some of these. And can I point out that for the time they were first written, so long ago, that they were thought up by MEN:stickpoke::stickpoke:

[Marcarl]

Crazy how no-one thought to update some of these. And can I point out that for the time they were first written, so long ago, that they were thought up by MEN:stickpoke::stickpoke:

Now if you read close, there are rules against beating women,,,, where ever that would have come from,,,,,,,, and do you really think a man would have thought of that???? nah it's the women behind him, letting him take all the blame,,, now they're trying to change that,, do they really want to???,,,huuummmm

[Flyinfool]

Judging from the wording of some, I'll bet that it was not MEN that came up with them.

[SilvrT]

Judging from the wording of some, I'll bet that it was not MEN that came up with them.

 

behind every good man....stands a woman (tellin him what to do)

[saddlebum]

5. In Bozeman, Montana, a law prohibits all sexual activity from the front yard of a home after sundown.

I dont see anythign wrong with this law. 1st it only prohibits sexual activity after sundown, well your not going to get maney spectators after sundown anyway, and since it obviously implies that before sundown is ok. Heck your going to get more spectators then anyway

:rotfl:

[Brake Pad]

In the city of Davie Fl. everyone should be carrying a Revolver, from the age of 6 years

 

In Florida, It is illegal to walk around in your own home nude.

 

 

N.Y.City, you can not sit on a bench longer then 10 minutes. or you will be arrested for vagrancy

[dray]

I dont see anythign wrong with this law. 1st it only prohibits sexual activity after sundown, well your not going to get maney spectators after sundown anyway, and since it obviously implies that before sundown is ok. Heck your going to get more spectators then anyway

:rotfl:

 

now thats a law that should have been updated when they invented the yard light

 

yes power could be cut to some homes just before sunset :bang head: dont look; dont look; dont look;

[Rick Haywood]

Crazy how no-one thought to update some of these. And can I point out that for the time they were first written, so long ago, that they were thought up by MEN:stickpoke::stickpoke:

 

 

We have been screwing things up for years. Just think when the people from other planets come here in 1000 years and the first two things they look at to determine how the male species was They will first see America's Funniest Home Videos and then read these stupid laws. These two things alone shows how stupid we are.

[marinakorp]

Honey...guess where we are going this Sunday?

 

South Carolina... to renew our vows at the courthounse!

[mbrood]

In Idaho, it's carefully worded... It's illegal for a man to ride a horse or a woman on the opposite side of the street. You just know somewhere in there is a law just meant to be broken...

[Sailor]

It has been a long time since I have seen these but I think I have it right...

In Montreal it is illegal to ride a motorcycle while wearing headgear which would alarm a reasonable person.

In Toronto it is illegal for a woman to ride a motorcycle while wearing a negligee. (I may have Toronto and Montreal crossed up there.)

In Alberta it is illegal to carry a woman on the back of a motorcycle unless you have a shotgun slung over your left shoulder. It is also illegal to ride a motorcycle to church on Sunday.

In B.C. it is illegal for a woman weighing over 200 lbs to ride a motorcycle while wearing shorts.

[SilvrT]

In B.C. it is illegal for a woman weighing over 200 lbs to ride a motorcycle while wearing shorts.

 

... and I wouldn't want to see one without them!