sad day a little prayer please

[oldgoat]

its been a real hard day for me today.

im now the last man standing. when i joined the army back in 1977 5 of us hooked up and went in together. there was crazy bill anderson. born 1957 died 1988. outlaw john walker. born 1956 died 2008. alittle out there. dave olson. born 1958 died 2008. and today old wild cat. eugene (sonny) siltman. born 1957 died 2010. decide that life was not worth living any more. and decide he wanted to go home. and took his own life..

then my sisters verry best friend lost her battle with cancer.

 

sometimes i wonder what goes through a persons mind to do this?

how bad are the demons that tormented him.

why did he fool all of us. he seemed all right last time i saw him?

we all did one thing in life we wanted to do after our time with the service.

we rode our honda 750.s from mn to az and back. what great memories.

the 2 of us where hopeing that we could get our bikes in good enough shape for a long ride again. but at last he wont be there. thats why some how some way. i have to get the venture in great shape for next year. and i will get it done. i need one last long ride.

they where my friends from my youth and past. i thank the lord for all of you. my new friends. in my middle years.

just remember ride like it might be your last and enjoy gods world.

peace my brothers and sisters

[ThomWill]

Peace to you James. I still keep up with a lot of my old service buddies and I know that someday one of us will be where you are. While it has to be hard to be the last man standing, it beats the alternative. Hang in there.

[etcswjoe]

My prayers go out to you. It is hard to think about those we served with and grew up with who have went before us whether it be from war, sickness or other things. I will keep you in my prayers and God Bless.

[Tom]

I lost a friend 2 years ago that took his own life. You just never know. Prayers are sent your way.

[steve crossley]

I understand - your right - Peace to you

[Aussie Annie]

God Bless you too James. Memories are great solace at times, aren't they.

[mraf]

Sorry to hear of your loss. Life is full of twists and turns just remember its not the candle or the wick its the burn.

[Dano]

Oldgoat, for awhile whilst you were going thru rehabbin' with your doting girl-who-moved-away, I thought you must be much older than me. I too was born in '57, but I figure I'm only 53, my grandpa lived up into his high 80's, my moms still driving (just turned 80) and I have a young buck of a son who just turned 18, that's enough to keep me from thinking that since I turned 50 I gotta slow down. Matter of fact, they WON"T let me slow down!

 

Soooo, if you will be needing some help to get that bike on the road to get some of your "bucket list" items checked off, you just let me know if'n I can help in any way. You can't help what happened to your buddies, just remember them in the best way possible. And that may possibly be by getting out there next year and riding that bike like you used to. The wife and I (and possibly a few others) would be honored if you rode with us out to Cody next year for the International. Heck, for that matter, might as well hook up with us and go up to Dons for Maintenance Day!

 

I do feel badly for your loss, and my prayers will go out to your brethren-in-arms and your sisters best friend. But as for you, my friend, lets go out and grab life by the b*lls and enjoy doing it!

 

Dano

[oldgoat]

thanks dano and every one. i called Dianne up in the great north dakota state. and then my daughter and well i just balled. i guess its ok for an old goat to do that. yep dano. im only 52. but sometimes feel like a old goat. im not sure where your from? but lets just say. i will look forward to a good ride with ya when the weather gets better. next spring.

you know what they say the bike dont have to look good just run good. and well it did give me some good miles this year. and help from friends here made sure i got them miles. im thinking the front end got a little lose and will address that problem in the spring time. right now just dont even want to think about it. till spring. and my savings grow.

i have dingys tool and think its just a steering bearing tighten thing. or replace.

but right now i shouldnt be thinking about the bike. many thanks to you and every one..

[Dano]

I'm just over here in Indy, so it's not that far........

[coy55boy]

Old Goat, you ain't the oldest old goat in these parts. I got ya beat by a few years and don't consider myself too old. If'n you do get that old bike up and runnin (and you will) and if'n you do ride it out to Az (and you will), you let me know and we'll share the road and a beer or two together.

 

Count yourself lucky to have had good friends for that many years. True friendship is a precious commodity not easy to come by. Many people spend their entire life without even one friend. Right now, you're feelin' pretty low...but, it'll pass. You know it will. And you'll soldier on. 'Cuz that's what's right for your family and friends (here and elsewhere) and yourself.

[massey130]

Peace is with you, it's in you back pocket, take it out.

angels are with you as are the prayers that keep circulating thru this community for all who need it.

[royalstarjac]

Sorry about your friends but haven't you heard? 50 is the new 30! It's only a number. We only have today anyway. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is but a dream.

[Grandpagak]

prayers sent..

[CaptainJoe]

Sorry to hear about your friends. Just remember your not old. 52 is my age an I intend to do at least 50 more. So techinically we're middleaged. Steve, my ex brother in law is 65 and we have gone from WV to Eugene, Washington to Titusville, FL and just all over. His only problem is his prostrate. He did say that he wouldn't be able to ride the bike without his Airhawk. Met a 80+ year old with his 70+ wife, they had a Harley with a sidecar. When we were talkin bikes he was just as enthused as any young person I know. Was complaining the the durn side car wouldn't let him lean into the curves :crackup:but said the wife wanted the sidecar and he perferred the company.

[1joeranger]

Oldgoat, I was born in 58 and joined the Army in 76. Hell, we might have shared some of the same mud together during our serivce! My father, who was a hard man but dearly loved, commited suicide many years ago. I, at one point, tip toed along the edge of that abiss as well. So I believe I can say I have walked in your shoes. Not much I can say to alleviate your pain. Just know there are others out there who can emphasis with you!

 

I am now 52, with two grown daughters who for some reason, even knowing that I do not walk on water, love me dearly and I, them! I am in great shape after deciding years ago I did not want to look like the old man with the tire bulge and the health issues. I date a women who quite frankly has the best looking rear I have ever seen!

 

Not all thing are roses. The economy has hit me hard and I am constantly scratching two pennies together. Some months it creative financing time to pay the bills. I make less today then I did 15 yrs ago and I have no savings. BUT, I have a job and we do manage to pay the bills and have a little left over to go camping with the bike about every other month. So I choose to be happy with what I have and I choose to savor the things that are good in my life.

 

I hope that this, in its own way, helps! I would love to sit with ya one day and share old war stories, or BS and lies as we use to say. I would love to hear about your friends, who now must live on through you. We are all from the same generation and it would be neat to compare similarities! Keep that chin up!!

[Squidley]

James,

 

Sad news to hear my friend, but everything in life has a purpose. Taking one's life may not seem to have a valid message in it, but can turn perspectives. I'm not as old as you folks (although I do feel a lot older on some days) but I lost one of my lifelong friends of my youth when we were both 18. He too decided that life wasn't worth living and took his life. To this day I never understood why he did it, he was a good looking fella, very smart, strait A student and liked.

 

As others have mentioned, there are some of us that have flirted with taking our own lives. I have too years back, but decided against it. Friends come and go, it's important that we never give up on ourselves. You have the # and I'm always happy to hear your voice, life will get better, there are many more roads to concur....all the best.

[Iowawegian]

Just wanted you to know that my thoughts and prayers are with you as you go thru this grieving process. Some things we'll never understand.

[Guest Ken8143]

Oldgoat - ditto to what everyone has said. I too have lost a good buddy to suicide and it is a real kick to the gonads. It just hurts and hurts. And walking on the edge...well that is not so pleasant.

 

Fortunately I have a lot of people who care for me, and knowing the pain that my friend left behind, I decided long ago that I can not do that to my loved ones.

 

We care for you, even though I have never met. We are brothers (and sisters) to each other, sometimes closer than our own blood.

[kenw]

I can feel for you. I worked for ATT in a chemical enviroment and am the last man standing----it can be rough, but I'll be praying for you!