What's YOUR "prime case of stupid"?

[mraf]

I was 15 and didn't have the money to fix the rear brakes on my Kawasaki 90, so I would stop it by down shifting to 1st and popping the clutch. The back tire would slide me to a stop. WAIT, that's not the dumb part!

 

The girl who lived across the street from me had invited the whole cheerleader squad over to practice in her front yard.

I came home on the bike, turn into the driveway and pop a wheelie. I ride the wheelie almost to the end of the driveway, bring the front wheel down and down shift to first to stop, problem was I down shifted to neutral instead of first. I pop the clutch and it felt like I sped up instead of stopping. I rolled through my parents carport, into the utility room and stop when I hit the washing machine.

The cap on the gas tank catches me by the genitals and my nose on the window sill above the washing machine.

 

I was so embarrassed, I opened the window and climbed through it into the back yard and laid in the grass until I could walk again.

 

:rotfl::rotfl: That is funny!

 

67 Chevelle convertible 396 and 17 years old. A friend and I were sent to the store for a beer run. Coming back I turn onto the road {fresh oil and stone} back to the party and lace into it hard. Two complete 360s ending up crossing the right hand ditch facing the road. Didn't do any damage to the car until I put it back in gear and jumped the ditch which pushed the radiator into the fan. DUH!

 

Same car had a quirk that would turn on the windshield wipers when it would be just about at top end. I always thought that it probably was my guardian angel telling me to slow down.

[dingy]

This probably doesn't make my Top Ten List of Stupid, but it is motorcycle related.

 

The main cruising road in town where I live is about a mile long, on the west end there is a large parking lot that is used as a turnaround. It has been there for a long time.

 

Picture below shows it with the Venture setting in parking lot, just off of the street. I took this tonight to give a visual with this. As you can see to the left side of the entrance to the parking lot the pavement drops down to street level about 2 1/2 feet from the white line to the sidewalk.

 

About 30 years ago, I was on a 750 Honda and came turning into this lot, just about in line where the venture is sitting, way to fast. When I hit the incline, I was catapulted into the air, I maintained a death grip on the handle bars My body was straight up in the air, upside down as I clung to the bike. This was observed by my cousin behind me.

 

If this were the end of the story, it would have been an exiting ride. But, what goes up, must come down.

 

I quickly pivoted back down onto the seat of the bike, firmly mashing the family jewels.

 

I kept the bike up, but barely as I recall.

 

Gary

 

http://i1007.photobucket.com/albums/af193/gdingy101/IMG00079.jpg

[SilvrT]

LOL... just remembered the stupidest thing I ever done (as if the other one wasn't...)

 

Had this 58 Dodge 2door that I was re-doing. Had the interior gutted and had the steering wheel off. Had to go somewhere and get some parts so I placed an old pop bottle crate in for a seat and jammed the steering wheel onto the shaft and off I went ... here comes a bend in the street and as I go to make the turn, the steering wheel comes off... here's the car... going straight and me trying to turn it with the steering wheel, in my hand, not connected to anything!! LMAO... so I jamb the steering wheel back onto the shaft and crank the steering, forgetting I'm sitting on a loose pop crate... yup... next thing I know, I'm heading for the floor, still trying to steer the car. Luckily by this time I'd slowed down a lot and had the sense to tromp on the binders otherwise I'm sure I woulda wound up in somebody's yard...or worse!

[SilvrT]

 

I kept the bike up, but barely as I recall.

 

Gary

 

 

LOL... could you keep anything "up" after that ??

[a1bummer]

Well last year on a group ride, there was a $50 pot that would go to the first person to ride from one stop to the next naked, and... Well, this year they've changed the name of the ride to "Naked Biker Run", and guess who is the guest of honor.

 

 

P.S. The annual ride is coming up this Saturday buy the way, in Durand, Wi. at noon starting at The Construction Zone Bar & Grill. A band and free food!

 

P.S.S. I'll be keeping my clothes on this time. Out in public anyway.

[Trader]

Well I started this so I may as well add more to it!

 

I was riding my dirt bike around this farmers field and I guess we rode all dayaround the perimeter of the field where there was a gentle depression .

 

So this time I decided to ride uphill, thru the center of the field. I didn't realize that by the time the "gentle depression" reached the center fo the field, it was a big ditch.

 

As I was riding up the hill, it was hidden by tall weeds and next thing you know, I'm looking at a wall of dirt about 2 1/2 ft high right in front of me.

 

I tried to get the front end up...but not in time.

 

Next thing you know I was picking myself off the ground.

 

I dented the tank with my "groin area" and later found out that I had I dislocated my shoulder and I guess it popped back in while I was rolling

 

It was at least 10 minutes before I realized something was wrong with my arm!!!!!

[Yammy]

These aren't bike related but by the grace of God. My Dad was military we were stationed in France. As kids we played war, like most. The difference was, we had real bunkers, pill boxes and mine fields. Never occured to us that the odd cow that would step on a mine could happen to us.

 

We ended up at a shouting range collected a few shells and digging in the sand we found the rest of the bullets. Drilled out the spent caps on the casings to put in a fuse and several packages of fire crackers. Light the fuse!

 

I think everyone has a time. It's all about being at the wrong place at the right time.

Much like taking a corner wide, most of us have. Most of us haven't met the mack truck going the other way.

[murph35640]

Mraf, I had a 67 Lemans that would do the wiper trick also but they wouldn't go down until I slowed down some. I used to think that the wind was just blowing them into the vertical position but you couldn't pull them up by hand. That was without a doubt the fastest car I ever owned, broke the speedometer cable the first day I had the car probably somewhere around 140-150 mph!

 

 

I was painting an old dirt track car a few years ago without a mask of course, so about three coats in I noticed that the paint was really clogging up my nose. So being the genious that I am, I got to thinking you know I bet if I am really fast I bet I can get some of this lacquer thinner on a rag and clean my nose! Let me tell you buddy I wasn't nearly as fast with the rag as I was getting to the water hose and trying to snort water to put out the burn! Felt like my whole dang head was on fire for a minute there! Of course my son was about 9 years old at the time and he still reminds me of it from time to time.

[Sailor]

I was going to the coffee shop many years ago. I pulled up in front of the window and did a u-turn and came to a stop. The guys inside watched as I slowly disappeared. When I did not reappear they came out to find me lying there with my leg under the bike. My mind had been elsewhere and I had forgotten to put my foot down.

 

We were having lifeboat drill, this was back in the days of oar power. A couple of us old hands were excused as we had done it so many times and this was for the newer guys. We watched as they launched the boat and tossed the oars. The other guy said "Do you see what I see?" I said " Yep, think we should tell them?" not being serious. He said "Nope, they will find out soon enough." They had gone about 50 feet when one of them yelled that they were sinking, they had forgotten to put in the plug.

[BigBoyinMS]

When I was taking an Auto Mechanics class in the mid 70's I used to rebuild a LOT of carbs... Lots of Q-jets, a few Thermoquads and a few of everything else. Back then you could get a 5 gal pail of carb cleaner with a basket for the parts that really did clean the parts. Really good stuff. I always noticed that when I got it on my hands it would make them feel slick. One day I dropped a check ball into the bucket and reached in to get it out. When I stood up I noticed that instead of the black carb cleaner on my arms like I expected I had a milky looking liquid. That's about when I noticed the pain and figured out that the milky color was my skin melting and mixing with the cleaner. I couldn't get to the wash basin fast enough. Looking at my arms for the next couple of weeks you would have thought I had gotten a major sunburn from the way they were peeling.

Another time I dropped a bone handled knife into that same vat to clean it. Found out it was plastic and not bone.

 

In high school I drove 20 miles to an auto mech class for half a day when I was a Senior. I would usually take a friend home and there was a set of train tracks on the way that were built up so where the road crossed them it made a nice 'jump' if you hit it fast enough. One day I just as I was "4 wheels off the ground" above the tracks I look over and I'm looking straight into the front end of a locomotive. Luckily... it was parked. Probably the biggest scare of my high school years.

[ToyOdie]

This is one of many. When I was a senior in high school (1974) a buddy and I were coming home from a party in my first car, a 67 VW. We had had a few beers and decided to take a short cut through the county park. This was in the early spring and the lake that the park road went next to was used for Miami Vally flood control for the Ohio river. In the spring they close the dam to prevent run off of the melting snow from flooding the river. This particular night the barriers were not closed on the road, but the dam had been. Needless to say we found out that VW's do float. The snow tires churned like a paddle wheeler and took us about 100 yards to the other side of the flooded road. If we had not gone straight we would have ended up somewhere in the middle of the lake. We didn't realize how lucky we had been until the next day when we sobered up.

[Sailor]

I have had many sports cars and this particular MGA had two 6 volt batteries behind the seats. One dark night I was ripping down a back road and hit railroad tracks that had been built up. I launched and in mid air everything quit, the battery terminal had disconnected. I hit the road and reached back and re connected it, all at about 95mph in pitch black.

 

I had my fairly new '85 Madura ( think V Max) and was sold on the power and 6 speed trans. One day I pulled out to pass a semi going uphill. There was another semi coming the other way but I figured I could make it. I got up level with the cab and everything quit. I glanced down and realized I had hit the 11500 rpm rev limiter (in testing this engine they ran it at 14000 rpm with no problems but thought that would be a little insane for the street) . I quickly up shifted and hit the gas and managed to shoot between the two semis. I am now a little more cautious.

[Mischevious]

I would have to say the dumbest thing I have ever done is to ride while being angry with the girlfriend. This happened back in the early 90's when I live in Germany. I had a 1990 Suzuki GSXR1100. I ate up corners like there was no tomorrow. Well after fighting with the GF I got on the back and left. Going down one of the many beautiful roads in the country I was hitting it pretty hard. This bike had been tuned to run ( 156hp). I was getting even more angry with the slow car in front of me and decided to pass him. Problem was I didnt know there was a sharp left turn coming up. I passed and went into the curve and around 100moh. I didnt make the turn and went off the right side of the rode. Now at this point it is amazing how many thoughts can go thru your head in a split second. ( Like what the hell was I thinking, why am I such an idoit ect....). I hit the wall of the ditch at just over 90mph. Got launched over the handlebars 65 yrds out into a field. Broke my tailbone left foot and left hand. Needless to say I dont ride angry anymore and I certainly dont ride crotch rockets anymore either. God smiled on me that day and I have never forgotten it.

[FuzzyRSTD]

I am in the same boat as Don. Which one? I have an idea... Let me ask my wife, she seems to remember them all.

Yes for sure, what he said. I'll be back.................

[kenw]

I guess chopping down a tree and spending about 3 monthas in rehab, and having a big old staple holding my knee together. otherwise finding out my leg doesn't touch the ground when stopped for a light! I guess that's why they make bodyshops!!

[Snarley Bill]

i can honestly say i have never done anything stupid. they were all honest mistakes.

[Longhaul]

I gave a necklace to a girl I had a crush on in 4th grade, it was the Star of David, I went to a Catholic grade school:headache:. Was I not paying attention to something?

[Guest Tinman]

I have always told others to ride scared, that the other drivers are out to kill you, and if they don't get you, the road will do it for them.

I was on a cross country trip in 1986 on a old BMW with a Vetter fairing and homemade saddle bags. It was the "God provides" school of touring, and I was on my way to Idaho on Rt2 in Montana. I pulled over to the side of this 2 lane highway just to take a picture of something or other, but when I put my right foot down, there was NOTHING THERE! The road ran right next to a deep ditch, and the grass had grown up so tall that it hid it completely, so my foot just kept going down. When it had reached bottom, I was upside down in the ditch with a fully loaded '79 Beemer on top of me. I was not injured, but it took me almost half an hour trying to get out from under.

PS - I never did get that picture!

[juggler]

I guess I'm pretty boring. Nothing much to report although I've had a car or two and my RSV airborne a few times, but nothing too impressive.

 

About the most stupid was when I had a 1979 Dodge B200 extended van. It was carpeted through out (walls, ceiling etc. ) and the back seat folded down into a bed. On one of my monthly trips to the Naval Reserve center in Duluth, MN my cooler full of pop and stuff had slid to the back of the van. I tried to slam the brakes and make it slide back forward but it was caught on something. So on a straight stretch of road I set the cruise control, got up and walked to the back of the van and dragged the cooler back up front. Then I just sat back down and started driving again. Oh, the cruise was set at 75mph.

[BuddyRich]

Don would get mad at me if I posted them all. Use up all his server space... Problem is not doing stupid things in my case..:rotf:

[mraf]

I guess I'm pretty boring. Nothing much to report although I've had a car or two and my RSV airborne a few times, but nothing too impressive.

 

About the most stupid was when I had a 1979 Dodge B200 extended van. It was carpeted through out (walls, ceiling etc. ) and the back seat folded down into a bed. On one of my monthly trips to the Naval Reserve center in Duluth, MN my cooler full of pop and stuff had slid to the back of the van. I tried to slam the brakes and make it slide back forward but it was caught on something. So on a straight stretch of road I set the cruise control, got up and walked to the back of the van and dragged the cooler back up front. Then I just sat back down and started driving again. Oh, the cruise was set at 75mph.

 

I guess this is where the saying "God as my Co-Pilot" comes from.:rotfl:

[Trader]

I was cruising around with my buddy in his old beat up VW. Can't remember if they all had it...but this one had an "OH SH#T" handle on the dash in front of the passenger.

 

We went screaming around this one 90 degree corner....and the door, which I was leaning against, flew open.

 

So completely mis-using what few brains the good Lord gave me, I promptly let go of the "0H SH#T handle so I could break my fall as I fell out onto the ground.

 

Can you say "DUH!"?

[Squidley]

Well, those that know me here will get a good laugh out of this, y'all will.

 

When I was young, not even in my 20's yet, my best friend and I would always hook up after we got off work and go out drinking. I can remember on more than 1 occasion that we ran out of beverage in the cab of the old '72 Chevy truck he had at the time. The other beer was in the bed cold in the cooler. Without missing a beat or him slowing down I crawled out the side window into the bed of the truck, tossed in a few beverages, and climbed right back in, all while he was doing 55mph.

 

Then there was the time when he and another good friend of ours were in his '78 Volare. Screwing around on the back country roads and generally being dumb arses. We were flying (80mph+) down Hessen Road in St. Clair county we totally forgot about the 4 ft drop off in the road. There just happens to be a stop sign there at 32 mile rd about 100 yards from that drop off. Yeah, you know where I'm going here, Dukes of Hazzard car was airborne for about 60 yards and all 3 of us doing that "Oh chit" cry. Car finally touched down locked up the brakes and power slid that Plymouth onto west bound 32 mile rd before we hit the ditch on the other side I can laugh at it now, but if there was another car coming we all would have been dead I have no doubt.

 

There are so many others, but that will have to be saved for a campfire at a rally

[Aussie Annie]

Boy, I've had some good belly laughs at your expense

I can come in here for a good laugh and de-coke :sign yeah that:And if you think I'm going to put anything in here...think again some were so funny: Pastor Paul and the dog "ice slick", easyduzzit, and many more :crackup::crackup:

[Pic]

When I was 19 a friend of mine and I were on our 75 Yamaha 250 Enduro's riding in my hometown. We stopped at a stop light on one of the major roads and his brother pulled up beside us in his Chevelle. Asked Kenneth if we wanted a beer. He said sure and took one from his brother and handed to me and he took one for himself. We opened them and drank em riding thru town. Now this was a dry town, mainly Southern Baptist at the time. If we had been spotted by the LEO's we would have probably gone to jail.

 

Something about riding with him on those bikes got us in trouble more than once. We were at a park on a big lake in the area the young folks used to hang out at on weekends. The park had a big circular drive. We had been there all afternoon with friends hanging out and drinking beer. When we got ready to leave we both decided to ride a wheelie all the way around the park, it was packed with people and we were showing off. About 2/3 around there was a cop standing in the middle of the road waving us to the curb. Asked what the hell we thought we were doing. I told him just showing off. Asked how much we had to drink that day and we both said a couple of beers (more that a couple). He asked where we were headed and we told him home. He said if we would go straight home he would let us go. We promised we would and he said to consider this our lucky day, he was getting off shift and did not want to the paper work for arresting us. He did follow both of us home to make sure we went straight home and were all right to drive.

 

Needless to say I quit doing those fooolish things as I got older.