Robbed by midgets

[qdude]

Ok 100% true. I went to a discount grocery, you know, the kind with no sackers and you box your own food. I took my 1/2 cart of paid for groceries to the boxing area, but there are no boxes... so I leave the cart and go to look for boxes. I return with boxes a couple of minutes later and no cart anywhere. After a minute of "What the **ck" I realized I have been robbed and I ran into the parking lot.

 

There is only one family with more than one cart loading groceries.

I would describe the family as extremely robust midgets. The tallest was a teenage girl who towered at 4'10" ish. It wouldn't have looked much out of place if these folks had been loading groceries onto donkeys to return to the coffee plantation in the mountains. No donkeys but instead they were loading into a Fordasaurus, one of those ancient huge LTD cars.

 

They had 3 carts with mine between theirs. They had put a 12 pack of toilet paper and huge box of sanitary napkins over my groceries as camouflage. I ran up to them and screamed "what the hell is wrong with you!".

 

The biggest girl giggled and said her parents didn't speak English. The parents kept loading loose groceries, none had been boxed, into the trunk. The parents never looked up and were seemingly oblivious and unaware of the screaming mad gringo.

I ripped my cart out from the middle of the carts and started pushing it back to the store to box the groceries. A few seconds later the dad yelled in a heavy Spanish accent, "WAIT A MINUTE."

 

I am now thinking, I came here to get milk, hamburger and cookies and somehow I'm going to be fighting a Mexican midget.

The Dad rushed up to my cart and with burning angry outraged eyes... the eyes of a man who just had his sanitary napkins hijacked. He grabbed his 12 pack of toilet paper and huge box of sanitary napkins. It may have been the first time, in America, he was the victim of theft.

 

Ok, so I'm back inside boxing up and here comes the 2 teenage girls. I guess their parents decided they now needed boxes since rapid exit was no longer necessary. The girls got their boxes and the tallest one smiles at me, not a malicious smile, but a smile like we had shared one very odd, but apparently not embarrassing moment.

 

I'm pretty sure I could have taken the midget if push came to shove.

Edited February 13, 2010 by qdude

[Kregerdoodle]

better have your shin gaurds on.... he`ll kick the H#@! out of ya!!!

 

 

Glad it all worked out ok and you got your stuff!!

[emtdouggood]

Atleast you did not get the short of things.

[Celt]

good job they were'nt Scottish midgets ,they head butt ...........nuff said

[ronhenry4]

one of my step-daughters (16 yro twins ) is only 4'10 i will ground her if i find out it was her ....

[qdude]

Well if your step daughter's other dad looks like a small Juan Valdez, you might ask

[Snaggletooth]

Sounds like it could have been seconds away from another round of "Dwarf Tossing".

 

[uncledj]

I took part in a midget toss at a bar one night. I thought I could throw "Little Larry" through the juke box at the other end of the bar, but those little guys are pretty heavy....he only went about 10' or so....I'm sure I'd have done better if I were sober.

[Guest seuadr]

wow.

 

seems society is getting short on morality. i'm glad you were the bigger man in this, though.

[6pak]

this looks like it should be in Jokes and Humor- had me laughing my a-- off!

[Wanderer]

This is one funny POST. I've laughed so hard I'm crying. Thanks guys.

[raceman62race]

Just be glad it was only groceries they tried to take. The day before Christmas, my mother (72 years old) was loading her groceries into the back of her PT Cruiser when 2 ladies drove up beside her and rolled the window down and asked for directions. My mother gave directions as best she could and suddenly one of the ladies jumped out of the car and shoved my mother to the ground and grabbed her purse and sped away. This happened in the parking lot of Ingles in Madison GA around noon. My mother hurt her hip, shoulder and had a nasty bump on her head from the fall. They got away with several hundred dollars cash, credit cards and check books. They charged up several hundred dollars of goods in Conyers GA before my mother could cancel accounts. She's not going to have to pay for it but it all still sucks. Mom recovered and is doing well now.

[Eck]

Good story..

 

 

Don't know if I would have handled it as well as you did, but you never know, the little man could have had a gun in his pocket...and push come to shove,,,,he just might have gone for pulling the trigger...

[ddoggma]

Glad you came out alright. Never know these days whats gonna go down. Two weeks ago I stopped a thug from beating a women is the street. After a near accident I guess. As I was rolling up on them, stopped in the middle of a major road in front of a McDonald's. I saw what looked like 4 men pushing and shoving each other. Then I see this big young black guy with a hoodie on. Drop the one guy with a nasty right cross. It was a women...she went down like she was shot. Now I'm right up on it and can see hes beating this women up bad. Dragging her by the hair etc. The other black guy was menacing the guy that was with her. I jumped out of the truck. Put the guy is a rear naked choke and squeez...couldnt lock it in right, cause he was so tall and my coat was real thick. He still stopped whooping her ass, and started to react to his new buddy on his back,,,lol I felt him panic and try to muscle out of my hold. I let him go, to see what he was gonna do. now that she was up and away from him. He turned looked at me..and swung at the guy next to me, and missed. The white couple jumped in their car and left...sigh. I was yelling at all the cars around us to block them in. No one would, as I moved to my van to block them, they got in there ride a chirped out of there. 30 secs later the cops show. while telling story giving description the officer says, "we just pulled them over" I can only hope. These guys were bad dudes. Halfway thru it I was like, This guy might have a gun. But, I allway told myself if I saw a women in trouble like that. That I was not gonna stand bye and watch. Which, bye the way was what 20-30 other people were doing from about 20 feet away at the McDs'. The manager did offer to buy me lunch. It also made me feel like I made a difference, in a good way to the world, that one day. I did have my bouvier with me, but if he attacks anyone...badguy,goodguy etc. That person is going to the hospital, Is badly injured, and is gonna sue the crap outta me...lol Not funny I guess. But its nice to know hes got my back if I need him.

Edited February 13, 2010 by ddoggma
very bad grammer...lol

[Zfrebird4]

I did some street fighting when I was a teenager in E. St. Louis, Ill., where I lived. Couldn't do it now at my age of near 71!. Planning to secure and open carry, here legal. I predict that things will start to get rougher, and more so, as this economy going south appears to be only starting. The country is already bankrupt, thanks to Congress and the White House for several Presidents. Glad you were there.

 

He's lucky my Marine buddy wasn't there, or he'd be flat on his arsss, foot on throat, waiting for the cops.

 

People like you do make a difference. I am so glad some of you are still around.

 

Take care, and thanks for what you did!

 

JackZ

Ft Collins, CO

 

:happy65::thumbsup2::thumbsup::clap2:

[Dragonslayer]

The nerve of some midgets. They have a lot of kahunnas for being so short.

[qdude]

It's unlikely they were members of the American Federation of Midgets because back home they would have been thought of as real small, ... but when they saw an opportunity they acted fast. Fast criminal Hispanic elf's. Sounds scary termed like that.

 

http://www.lajerga.com/m/i/articles/issue2/midget-bullfighting/midget-bull.jpg

[SaltyDawg]

Now that's funny. I don't care who you are that was funny!!!

[72ranger]

I too was in tears!!

 

Good job for keeping your cool!