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Yama Mama

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Squidley!!!!......who found out the age old question whether a bear poops in the woods is a true statement after stepping in the slop and was busy doing his own clean the shoe dance:dancefool:. Oh where oh where did he appear from you may ask......Why Pardner, im'a making my way to Texas he said, and I saw this strange ritual taking place and I thought id stop to offer some help. Once I realized that I actually knew this band of fruitcakes I thought I could slip away quietly but, no, those dang ol' bears and their poop. A loud scream erupted from the back of the group and we all stepped aside while this flaming second gen came blasting through. As the rider removed his helmet a GASP came from the crowd. OMG said the women, it's..........
another under powered second gen. This story is moving so slow we'll never get to Daytona before Biketoberfest is over. It's already half over now.
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another under powered second gen. This story is moving so slow we'll never get to Daytona before Biketoberfest is over. It's already half over now.

 

I dunno..your the banana pie that keeps slowing us down......And Biketoberfest is over..I say we shoot for Key West and hang out with the Parrotheads down there while sipping on flaming margaritas..........:parrots::225:

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I dunno..your the banana pie that keeps slowing us down......And Biketoberfest is over..I say we shoot for Key West and hang out with the Parrotheads down there while sipping on flaming margaritas..........:parrots::225:
Actually the truth of the matter is my bike is acting sick. I'll think I'll drop off at the house in Atlanta get on the tech talk threads and chase some electrical gremlins. I'll catch up with ya'll down the road when she is fealing better.
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Wouldn't it be fun if Jimmy Buffet would show up too. Yama Mama says, ok me likes margaritas.

I like golden ones, strawberry ones, and Mango ones. But I really cannot drink..................:parrots:

Only one! I have to have 2 or 3 or more!!!

 

"Hey" Bongo Bob said, "My sister in law lives in the keys, we can probably drop in there for a while!!! Her Hubby probably won't mind." Wel, seeing as the weather was starting to turn on the chilly side, we decided that may be a good idea, as long as there aren't any hurricanes coming while we are there. So, we all pluged in the address into our GPS's and everyone started out going a different direction. Oh, no!!! what should we do?? Hurry, everybody is getting out of CB range...

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So who's got the stebel air horn's on the bike??:confused24: and why aren't you letting them rip?? C'mon toot them things before everyone disappears over the hill. :bowdown:

 

Next minute there is a deafening sound of many horn's going at once. Well, that brought all the rider's back to see what was up.

"Okay, we need to try a different plan here folk's" says massey130.

Squidley then makes the suggestion of us all...............................

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"Okay, we need to try a different plan here folk's" says massey130.

Squidley then makes the suggestion of us all...............................

 

can get our tools out and separate Massey from the desert bar he is haulin around on his scoot's trailer. riders in the back are squabblin about gettin chocolate on their bikes and havin to lick it off the mirrors. besides, haulin the bar around is temptation enough,especially with die-ah-bet-tic on the ride. massey iz havin target fixation trouble with one arm pointing at trailer via handcuff & one one throttle. it does cut wind buffeting, but i need to steer with both eyes. the weather will be better as we head south. then it gets cloudy - but no, it's a large tour bus with a band on board. they stop to check out the dude getting separated from a desert bar. the door opens and out steps . . . . .

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Gene Simmons and "KISS" and they still got their make-up on from the last gig :doh: They look like they could be rented out to haunt houses :stickpoke:

"Hey, where you all going'?" asks Gene?..............

"We came all the way from the Land of Lame Punk Rock Bands of the Past to find y'all. We are trying to make a come back since my reality TV show just didn't make it." Gene said.

 

After much thought and discussion and an extensive market opinion survey we decided that what we needed was some new talent and a new look. So we sent out talent scouts and fashion/image designers out far and wide to circle the globe to find just exactly the best talent available as well as what our new look should be. The audience survey said that what we need is a horn section, a Harmonica Player, a new drummer, Pink chaps and Unicorn/Pink Rose/Rainbow/Tinker bell matching Tattoos inked by Virginia the Dominatrix Tattoo artist. We also plan to loose the Halloween make-up. Which is a good thing since it was really destroying Gene's creamy smooth complexion.

 

So the talent scouts and fashion/image designers came back with the information that

the Venture rider.org forum family were the most talented group on the planet and contained all the elements that we have been looking for. We had even heard that your group also has an Aussie pole dancing lass on crutches sporting black leather crutch holder/pasties (which gave her a somewhat Madonna like appearrence) and a frisky friskette moped riding mama which we would like to hire as dancing back-up singers.

 

We just heard your Strebel Horn section and loved it. We also are looking for the harmonica playing Dragon slayer and Blackjack and his son who are world class drummers for a dual drummer percussion section. So if y'all will agree to join us we are planning to do a galaxy wide tour called the Inter Galactic Venture Tour. "So, what do y'all think?" Gene asked.

 

The VR group formed a huddle to discuss the proposition. After several minutes of muffled discussion Yama Mama raised her head and asked "Can we do Jimmy Buffet cover music, especially Pencil Thin Mustache which is one of the Dragonslayer's favorite Karoake songs and drink Margarittas on stage?" Gene answered, "Most assuredly":banana: a few minutes latter Massey130 raised his head and asked," Can we all have dessert bars in our dressing rooms at every concert?" Gene answered "Undoubtedly" :cool10:

A few minutes later Dragon slayer raised his head and asked, " Can I wear my Chrome suit of armor that matches my chrome harmonicas and shiny chrome Dragon slaying Broad sward instead of pink chaps on stage? And can I sing lead vocal when we do Pencil Thin Mustache.... The Boston Blackie kind? With a look of conciliation Gene reluctantly answered "That was not exactly what we had in mind but if it will cinch the deal we'll go along with it.":thumbsup2:

 

The VR group then answered in unison..........................................

Edited by Dragonslayer
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"The VR group then answered in unison..........................................

 

Hey, can we get our own reality show too?????!!!!!!

Gene Simmons stood there in shock. He could not comprehend to what degree of lunacy this VR group harbors. He stammered as he replied.......

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Hey, can we get our own reality show too?????!!!!!!

Gene Simmons stood there in shock. He could not comprehend to what degree of lunacy this VR group harbors. He stammered as he replied.......

 

 

What will Alice Cooper think when he hears this sheet? Oh my goodness "Born to be Wild" will never have the same meaning! I mean, Man, are we "Flirting with Disaster" on this one. we can't sing Driving Wheel by foghat anymore - Driving handlebars just sounds stupid. Maybe we need a Magic Carpet Ride kind of theme. this could mean make us or break us - Dead or Alive. ya know like bon jovi said. but then again it could put us in the "Driver's Seat". Well that may not work with these motorcyle riders. Sheesh, we might as try this and we may wind up "Leaders of the Pack" ! Dynomite Fellas this might just "Roll me Away" like Springsteen. So i say . . . . .

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With the musical tone of the moment, Quickstep looks at Aussie Annie in that special way a wife knows what's on her man's mind and he does his best Thoroghgood impression and softly sings to her " Who DO ya Love".

 

It was hard to see her blush under her helmet, but she lifted the faceshield and sang back "They call me the Breeze, I Keep rolling down the Road, wink wink, giggle giggle.

 

Get a room for goodness sake. this may be America, but we are running on empty stomachs right about now.

 

then from somewhere amongst the riders a Booming kind of voice sings "Girls, Girls, Girls"

Well, its on now. this is an impromptu Ventures Got Talent moment. Motorcycle songs begin sounding off . . . . .

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With the musical tone of the moment, Quickstep looks at Aussie Annie in that special way a wife knows what's on her man's mind and he does his best Thoroghgood impression and softly sings to her " Who DO ya Love".

 

It was hard to see her blush under her helmet, but she lifted the faceshield and sang back "They call me the Breeze, I Keep rolling down the Road, wink wink, giggle giggle.

 

Get a room for goodness sake. this may be America, but we are running on empty stomachs right about now.

 

then from somewhere amongst the riders a Booming kind of voice sings "Girls, Girls, Girls"

Well, its on now. this is an impromptu Ventures Got Talent moment. Motorcycle songs begin sounding off . . . . .

RandyR and his guitar circle from Norcross, Ga :guitarist 2::guitarist 2::guitarist 2::guitarist 2:and one fiddle:fiddle:began strumming the most famous motorcycle song of all times with the entire pack singing along.....Blackjack providing the percussion....of course.

 

Not only was this argueable the most famous motorcycle song of all times..it was one of the iconic signature songs of a very popular guitar strumming singer of country music songs of the sixties being fathered by an equally famous country singer of an earlier generation,............ which is obvious having been the father of the latter famous country music singer.......

Butttttttttttttttt, strangely enough although this song is one of the most famous motorcycle songs of all times the title of the song did not indicate that the song had anything to do with motorcycles................ in fact the title of the song indicated that is was about something completely different from anything you would associate with motorcycles...... and other than the one catch phrase lyric that made the song so memorable.... and the five minute long story spoken by the famous country music star of the sixties within the performance of this song ..... you would think that this famous motorcycle song was about a traveling minstrel getting arrested for breaking a guitar string .........while riding a motorcycle ......... which made him either a very talented musician or a very dangerous motorcycle rider.......... I assume the latter.......... since according to the story spoken by the country music singer and contained in the performance of this song...... he was traveling down a mountain road at 150 mph while playing his guitar and breaking a string...........causing him to crash by landing on top of a police car ..........and the subsequently flattened arresting officer :cop: with a humongous ..............Four foot long pickle...........

 

and yes, I suppose by now you have realized by the aforementioned monolog.........

(which the Dragonslayer was reciting with his cleverly pronounced and articulated best Arlo Guthrie voice)..................

 

That the song I am referring to is known as The Pickle Song

 

........................Pickles of course having nothing to do with motorcycles........................

 

At which time the entire group of VR riders in attendance starts singing in perfect unison with their very best Arlo Guthrie voices..........

 

I don't want a Pickle.................................I just want to ride my motorcic............cle

:900[1]::bikersmilie::7_6_2[1]::7_2_102[1]::7_6_3[1]:

 

:Im not listening to:Im not listening to:Im not listening to:Im not listening to

Edited by Dragonslayer
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Oh, Atlanta Dragonslayer -- me thinks yer pickles is too fermented!!

:doh::doh::confused24::think::rasberry::rasberry:

 

"Please don't start singing silly songs" sighs Aussie Annie, or Quickstep is gonna start singin' "Dead skunk in the middle of the Road":bang head: And his voice sounds like................................

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Oh, Atlanta Dragonslayer -- me thinks yer pickles is too fermented!!

:doh::doh::confused24::think::rasberry::rasberry:

 

"Please don't start singingg silly songs" sighs Aussie Annie, or Quickstep is gonna start singin' "Dead skunk in the middle of the Road":bang head: And his voice sounds like................................

The caterwauling of a nervous cat in heat.

 

You have a keen eye for the obvious, Aussie Annie. How did you know fermentation was the source of the distortion within the cob webs of useless information stored in the Dragonslayer's brain. It has always been the policy of the Dragonslayer to when required to eat pickles to eat the fermented ones first. That way the sour ones do not taste as bad.

 

Also stored in the fermented and convoluted brain of the Dragonslayer amongst the decades of accumulated useless information stored there is a treasure trove of silly, moronic and infantile songs, limericks and TV theme songs of the recent and ancient past. He also has a devious streak sometimes prone to playing mind games with the use of those silly songs.

 

During a romantic relationship of the past, realizing that his significant other was susceptible to subliminal suggestion he would intentionally sing a verse of one of the silly songs in his mental repertoire while his partner would be taking her daily morning shower. Knowing that this would trigger her to begin singing that song over and over again throughout the course of the day. He was greatly amused when her co-workers, friends and relatives would inquire of him why his significant other always seemed to be singing, humming or tapping out with her pencils the lyrics and melodies of such a wide range of silly,moronic, infantile songs, limericks and TV Theme songs at the most inopportune times and inappropriate places. Most of her acquaintances just thought that she was typically delusional. Which would allow him to secretly agree, without raising suspicion that he was the cause of such odd behavior in her.

Edited by Dragonslayer
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Please listen while I tell this tale

A tale of a famouse trip

That started from a tropic port

aboard a tiny ship

The Mate was a mighty sailing man

the skipper was brave and sure

Five passengers set sail that day

For a three hour tour

A three hour tour

The weather started getting rough

the tiny ship was tossed

if not for courage of the fearless crew

The Minnow would be lost

The Minnow would be lost............................

:whistling: :Im not listening to :bang head: :whistling: :Im not listening to :bang head:

:whistling: :Im not listening to :bang head: :whistling: :Im not listening to :bang head:

:whistling: :Im not listening to :bang head:

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Please listen while I tell this tale

 

A tale of a famouse trip

That started from a tropic port

aboard a tiny ship

 

The Mate was a mighty sailing man

the skipper was brave and sure

Five passengers set sail that day

For a three hour tour

 

A three hour tour

 

The weather started getting rough

the tiny ship was tossed

if not for courage of the fearless crew

The Minnow would be lost

 

The Minnow would be lost............................

:whistling: :Im not listening to :bang head: :whistling: :Im not listening to :bang head:

:whistling: :Im not listening to :bang head: :whistling: :Im not listening to :bang head:

 

:whistling: :Im not listening to :bang head:

 

ARE WE THERE YET...ARE WE THERE YET...ARE WE THERE YET.....ARE WE THERE YET......ARE WE THERE YET.....ARE WE THERE YET????????????????.............WE ALL SANG IN UNISON, CAUSING THE DRAGONSLAYER TO MUMBLE INCOHERENT THOUGHTS WHILE AUSSIE ANNIE SUNG SUBLIMINAL MESSAGES INTO HIS FERMENTED BRAIN.........OH THAT ANNIE IS RELENTLESS. EVEN I CANT BELIEVE WHAT SHE HAS THE SLAYER SINGING OVER AND OVER AND OVER WHILE A LOOK OF HEAVIILY GLAZED FROSTING COVERED HIS EYES........................:yikes::yikes::yikes:

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Yama Mama was excited about the glazed frosting. Slayer is a wonderful singer she thought to herself. She did notice that everyone, especially Annie was hysterically laughing. Yama Mama thought it would be fun for all of our members to dress up like the Gilligan Group for Halloween. Yama Mama decided she would be Mrs. Thurston Howell and she chose .............................:stickinouttounge:

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ARE WE THERE YET...ARE WE THERE YET...ARE WE THERE YET.....ARE WE THERE YET......ARE WE THERE YET.....ARE WE THERE YET????????????????.............WE ALL SANG IN UNISON, CAUSING THE DRAGONSLAYER TO MUMBLE INCOHERENT THOUGHTS WHILE AUSSIE ANNIE SUNG SUBLIMINAL MESSAGES INTO HIS FERMENTED BRAIN.........OH THAT ANNIE IS RELENTLESS. EVEN I CANT BELIEVE WHAT SHE HAS THE SLAYER SINGING OVER AND OVER AND OVER WHILE A LOOK OF HEAVILY GLAZED FROSTING COVERED HIS EYES........................:yikes::yikes::yikes:
See how it works when even a small subliminal message can

bore into your brain like some kind of mental parasite causing you to verbalize STRANGE MELODIC PSYCHIC MESSAGES............I have control of your brain now.......You are so susceptible to my will.... my wish will be your command.

Edited by Dragonslayer
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Ok if you insist. Can I still be Mrs, Thurston Howell?

You are in control of my mind, I will do what ever you tell me to do. (What am I getting into now, folks)

Ok lead me on Oh great leader of VR traveling group.

Just do not touch me on my..................

 

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Ok if you insist. Can I still be Mrs, Thurston Howell?

You are in control of my mind, I will do what ever you tell me to do. (What am I getting into now, folks)

Ok lead me on Oh great leader of VR traveling group.

Just do not touch me on my..................

 

 

way to this great singing and dancing adventure!! Dragonslayer decides to start singing one of his "silly" songs in the hope of distracting YamaMama

 

Hello mudda, hello farder

Here I am at Camp Granada

Camp is very entertaining

And they say we'll have some fun when it stops raining

I went hiking with Joe Spivey

He developed poison ivy

And my bunkmate Leonard Skinner.....

 

On and on he warbled, until he had all the group singing verses of the silly dang thing.

Huh, they are in my power now, he thinks, and decides to suggest to them all..........................................................

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On and on he warbled, until he had all the group singing verses of the silly dang thing.

Huh, they are in my power now, he thinks, and decides to suggest to them all............................................... ...........

 

 

Get back on the road. Gene S, the world and prime time are not even ready for the show the Venture Riders would put on. this mixed rag tag band of riders is off to finish Biketoberfest.

 

Ok lead me on Oh great leader of VR traveling group.

Just do not touch me on my..................

after the frisking in Nashville, Yama Mama is glad to escape into the "Lah-vee" Howell routine while she finishes recuperating. I just hope the bimbo side of the character doesn't slow us down, she has the map, ya know. It looks like we could be mounting our bikes while unknowingly humming

"It's the eye of the tiger,

It's the thrill of the fight

Rising up to the challenge of our rival

And the last known survivor

Stalks his prey in the night

And he's watching us all

With the eye of the tiger"

and so it goes until . . . . . . .

 

 

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Ok if you insist. Can I still be Mrs, Thurston Howell?

You are in control of my mind, I will do what ever you tell me to do. (What am I getting into now, folks)

Ok lead me on Oh great leader of VR traveling group.

Just do not touch me on my..................

 

Of course LOVIE, You can be Mrs. Thurstan Howell the 3rd if I can be Mr. Thurstan Howell the 3RD..........................................Oh No, what am I saying?????????????????? I can't be Thurstan Howell the 3RD because I am really the Professor. Using my scientific knowledge to control things around here.

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Get back on the road. Gene S, the world and prime time are not even ready for the show the Venture Riders would put on. this mixed rag tag band of riders is off to finish Biketoberfest.

 

 

 

after the frisking in Nashville, Yama Mama is glad to escape into the "Lah-vee" Howell routine while she finishes recuperating. I just hope the bimbo side of the character doesn't slow us down, she has the map, ya know. It looks like we could be mounting our bikes while unknowingly humming

"It's the eye of the tiger,

It's the thrill of the fight

Rising up to the challenge of our rival

And the last known survivor

Stalks his prey in the night

And he's watching us all

With the eye of the tiger"

 

and so it goes until . . . . . . .

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Dragonslayer turns to the group and shouts at the top of his lungs, in mid lyric,............................

 

 

 

 

 

SIMMON SAYS.............................

 

Quit singing &

START YOUR ENGINES

at which time the entire pack of VR riders quits singing , in unison and in mid word................ Eye of the TIG..., and hits the start button of thier bikes.

A great VAROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM was heard across three counties blowing countless numbers of Hardly Dangersons riders off thier bikes.

 

The Dragonslayer thinks to himself...........BINGO, I have succeeded in brain washing everyone to do my bidding. As long as I begin every command with SIMMON SAYS they will do as I say....... Now let's get this show on the road and conquer the world.

 

Simmon says.................

Edited by Dragonslayer
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